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Anonymous
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Losing a wife and mother
      #257 - 03/29/00 01:52 PM

Recently my beautiful wife passed away leaving me and two year old daughter alone. We never knew she was hiv+ until a few days before she died and it has left me numb and confused. HIV is an illnes that I have always been aware of but it has never directly affected me. I now find myself trawling pages like this looking for answers, information as to why, how this could have happened to us. The doctors reckoned she may have been positive for as long as twelve to fifteen years. How can this be? Even more confusing is that I have now been tested three times and am stil negative yet I spent over ten years with my wife. How can this be possible? I really would appreciate any thoughts, help or advice you may have to offer. Thank you for reading my message.



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E.C.
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Re: Losing a wife and mother new
      #258 - 03/29/00 01:53 PM

I know exactly how you feel, I lost my husband in June. He was diagnosed in April. We have a 6 year old that just had to spend his first birthday without his dad. We were married 14 years and I am also neg. So is my son. THIS IS A TERRABLE DISEASE!!! Not only does it put the victim in pain, but the rest of us have to LIVE with the pain of loss. My church has been very supportive, but that dosen't help at times like now...he was more than my husband, he was my best friend...I miss that the most. Hang in there, your daughter will be a great comfort to you.



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Deirdre
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Re: Losing a wife and mother new
      #259 - 03/29/00 01:54 PM

No one really knows why you would be negative after repeated exposure. You could be someone scientists need to study. It's also harder for men to get it from women than for women to get it from men--at least in the USA. It's a shock to lose anyone close to you--but when it's sudden it's the worse possible thing! My heart goes out to you. I helped my uncle while he was dying. But it took him 6 months to die. And we knew he was infected for 2 years before that. So we were psychologically prepared. It will take you a long time to get over this. Find out if your local hospital has a grief support group. It will really help!!!!! Or invest in seeing a therapist. What you went through is really traumatic and to recover you may need some help!
Good luck!
Deirdre K.



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Andy
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Re: Losing a wife and mother new
      #6390 - 06/29/00 09:48 AM

Read your note and thought I was reading a letter from myself. My wife passed away in February, leaving our 19month old son and me. We had been together for 9years and until she entered hospital in December I never knew she was positive. She never left hospital. PML took her away. My test was negative, as is the baby. Fortune smiles for some of us.




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