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HIV Life >> Living With HIV

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Reged: 08/30/09
Posts: 2
      #247434 - 09/03/09 12:06 PM


TRUST GAVE ME HIV...As my partners told me as they look clean and looks healthy, I wouldn't have thought that I'd get a virus by mere trust of the looks and their words.

I am recently diagnosed sometime late last year 2008 (with 190+ cd4 count), as far as I am concern I only have a handful of acquaintances I had sleep with and I was quite sure they look clean and healthy as I am myself. I never thought I'd get infected for I wasn't really that so out in exploring with my sexuality as a gay man. All the while I thought that with my judgment and TRUST I would be so careful enough and allowed myself unprotected during my contacts with them but then here I am now INFECTED with the HIV. Perhaps I've underestimated this illness and has not really take it seriously.

Now if you look around the city, no one could ever tell that one has HIV not even in a family member and it wouldn't be that easy for someone to open up that he or she has the virus, at least now I am single, young and is working. I opted not to disclose yet to anyone even to my family for the fear of rejections, I never want anyone to lose their trust in me, never want them to worry about the predicament I have at present and I don't want to be regarded as someone helpless in the family and in the society. At least till now I am all feeling well and has not been sick.

I know our government is doing something about this matter and there's a lot of NGO's who are into this kind of advocacy. I trust that HIV must be discuss seriously in the family and in school so everyone must see the value of preventing this illness. And that awareness is the best way of preventing this virus.

I haven't submitted yet myself for further treatment since I got my result because I was confused and was scared, but right now I am quite ready after searching out over the net about this illness and reading a lot of related articles and through prayers, I am now having this courage to start doing something about my health and thought of getting treatment for myself as soon as possible. With my status now, I am hopeful that I would be able to help out and be involve in preventing the spread of this virus and help saving young Filipinos from this illness and encourage victims like me to never give up and lost their hope.

After learning I got this virus, It was really the hardiest moment in my entire life, I felt like all my dreams has shattered that time, I used to be down and was tearing out so bad, I came to a point that I wanted to end my life, I lost my confidence and lost my focus on things I was at present and even failed a commitment which led to withdrawal of some important support I was doing at that time, but lately I meditated and re-composed myself and got a courage to stand up, wipe-out my tears and turned my energy to something productive, I go out and landed a job so I'd have resources to pay for my needs, bills and can do something for my health. I decided to be strong and move on than staying sad, crying and thinking back why I got infected and waiting for some miracles to happen. Crying and mourning over your situation is just okay but we should never allow it to consumed us, let's learn to be our own advocate, get educated, and find someone we can trust.

Right now, I am browsing the links online where I can get some help here in my country. And to anyone who's into same predicament, let's desire to be happy and trust that there's hope ahead of us and we will surely have a successful life.

Thanks and let’s take life POSITIVELY!

Stay a positive life always

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Reged: 09/11/09
Posts: 37
      #247558 - 09/15/09 08:06 AM

Thanku for sharing ur story...

Ur story is somewhat related to my story....
Even i had inprotected with someone who said he got tested recently....i dont knw i sometime rethink how stupid i cud b at that point in time? ...

I dont knw where these ppl go...may b there is a place worst than hell....

my bf was supportive for 2 to 3 days but after that he left thanks to god he is save....

We can pray to god...he wud give power....n i belive my god has started walking with me since my bf has left me...

God bless u ...and there wud b a cure soon....

Tc karan

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Reged: 05/25/09
Posts: 4
      #247560 - 09/15/09 10:18 AM

It is so true what you are saying dude but I'm glad you decided to pick yourself up and get on with your life. Most people feel that getting diagnosed with HIV is a death sentence but I see it as a blessing as from that day forward to try to leave everyday as if it is your last and you get to do all the things that you never thought you would do. Just make sure that you visit your doctor regularly even if you feel you have flue and to have your bloods checked for everything. The doctor will advice you when you should start taking medication but from your CD4 count you should be on medication already and that will boost you to the level of someone 100% healthy, if you get the correct combination. Just take good care of your self by getting lots of sleep, stay away from alcohol and smoking and drugs and unprotected sex, eat right and exercise a lot. You also need to take vitamins for strength and you will see change in a short while. Best of all a good attitude is going to get you through life. Remember at least you know your status and you can do something about it, unlike people who are just walking around waiting to die. Take care.


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Reged: 09/11/09
Posts: 37
      #247581 - 09/16/09 07:28 PM

thankyou once again for this post...ya thats true...even i live each in india they suggest to get cd4 checked after 6 freq u get checked....m abt to complete first 6 months....n dude god helps those who never hurt others.....v hv nt ditched any one one small mistake of trusting someone changed our life upside i always believe blessed....hv stopped dng sex as of yes m bit shy abt my diet...need to work on gud nite...its nite in india

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Reged: 02/13/09
Posts: 40
      #247603 - 09/17/09 11:10 PM

'trust' is one way of looking at it. Another way to look at it, is 'having uprotected sex' gave you hiv.

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