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rick36
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Newbie
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Reged: 06/01/09
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Posts: 4
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looking to talk about living with hiv
#245922 - 06/01/09 09:28 PM
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i was just told io hiv poz on the 29th and looking to talk to other people that r poz
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Hi Rick, I know you must be in a state of shock (as most of us who have been diagnosed are (were) Do you have someone close that you can talk to you? Family member/ friend? I think this is very important especiallly early on. All I can say is take a deep breath and don't let the news destroy you. Almost no one is dying of HIV today and for those younger people there may be a cure in your lifetime. One thing you must NOT do is have unprotected sex with anyone under any conditions from now on. Did you know there are many various strains and mutations of this virus and it is actually possible for you to re-acquire a new strain (or pass it on) even if you are under medication that is controlling your current infection. Time alone will make things better.
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Hang in there! I'm a newbie too and I just tested positive in April 2009, then as soon as my second set of blood tests came back, I was diagnosed with AIDS. Now that you've found out, you can take some actions that will help you in the long term.
First, it's a good idea to get hooked into some medical care. If you don't have health insurance, you might need to do a little more research, but there are resources out there. Yeah, there's tons of forms to fill out, proof of this, proof of that, and at first it can be daunting but it can work out.
Also, find a local resource that can direct you to some help. If your city has a LGBT Community Center (lesbian/gay/bisexual/transgender), that's a great place to start...and NO, you don't have to be gay to stop in! You will find compassionate people who want to help direct you to the right place! There's probably information available at your local health department too. You'll probably also be able to find a support group in one of these places. I've been lucky to already have friends who have been positive for many years. I also see a therapist, attend a men's support group (not HIV related) and try to stay connected with people - even if it's just to call and ask how "they're" doing.
For me, the "medical/clinical" issues didn't scare me as much as the toll this is taking on my emotional well-being. I have a lot of shame that I carry with it, which has really made it pretty rough too - but as I talk to more people, I realize that the shame is due to my OWN judgments and not the judgments of others. What I did find was important though was to be able to tell a few of my very closest friends and also made it very clear to them that I needed to be in control over the disclosure of my status to anyone - not them.
I'm not trying to make this sound easy - because I know it's not. I'm just over a month into this whole ordeal too and it has really been devastating to my emotional, physical and mental health. But for me, every day when I wake up, I realize that I have 2 choices (1) to let the HIV control me or (2) to take an active role in controlling the HIV and its impact on my life. Good luck!
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oldwoman
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Guardian
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Reged: 05/12/07
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Posts: 435
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Loc: Phila,Pa
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sdguyloveslife,I just wanted to say I love your attitude,nothing to add to the original posters questions as you two covered it all.
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you can email me afettig915@hotmail.com
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DJones
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All Star
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Reged: 04/02/09
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Posts: 82
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Loc: Milwaukee Wisconsin
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sdguyloveslive said it all very well. I just found out on January 7th I was HIV positive. A week later I also found out I was AIDS. The first two months were horrible. Mostly my own mind. I call this the biggest 'mind f*ck' I have ever gone through. I would love to talk if you want to. Email me at djones2659@att.net. I also started a blog the day I found out. You can see my progress in the last 5 months and what I have gone through daily at: http://daveslifelivingwithhiv.blogspot.com/
We must stick together and help each other through this. I have learned a lot since January.
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http://daveslifelivingwithhiv.blogspot.com/
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BeerMe30
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Member
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Reged: 06/09/09
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Posts: 17
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I found out May 13. Couple weeks of mental stress and now I am dealing with it better. My cd4 is defintiely an AIDS count but my viral load is considered very very low(4006). There is financial help etc. I am still waiting to meet with my doctor. Just keep plugging along. I have kept busy at work and social to keep myself from being depressed sitting at home. Good Luck!!!! we all need it!!!!
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