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Anonymous
Unregistered

Ugly Body
      #101197 - 07/11/04 12:35 PM

I've been poz for 10 yrs now and for the past 8 have dealth with major lypoatrophy issues - I'm only 33 and luckily my face is still ok, but I don't feel comfortable going to the pool, dating, etc. I just feel so ugly and veiny - who could possibly find my body attractive. Any words of wisdom would be appreciated - because it looks like I'm stuck with this body. I am glad to be alive, but it's hard when all you want to do is hide.

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deeanna66
Member

Reged: 06/19/04
Posts: 22
Loc: UNITED STATES
Re: Ugly Body new
      #101198 - 07/11/04 03:07 PM

be proud of who you are and what you are...i can relate to feelings about feeling ugly about how you look...i battled being fat all my life and went and had gastric bypass surgery to lose weight i was 400lbs know down to 230 and YOU KNOW WHAT???no matter what i do i always hate the way i look..i still feel huge and even after a big weight loss my battle in my head still goes on....so you are not alone..i have a wonderful husband who loved me fat and who loves me the way i'am now...but what holds me back is the way i SEE MYSELF AND THINK OF MYSELF....We are our own worst enemy's when we want to be...but no matter how you may look or feel about yourself theres someone out there who's gonna love you for you and even love your veiny body..lol. we just always seem to focus on the bad stuff about our lives and looks...and we forget their are people out there worst off than us...so my friend be proud of WHO YOU ARE AND WHAT YOU ARE...AND MAYBE YOUR NOT FINDING ANYONE SPECIAL BECAUSE YOUR
HIDING....It's time to Stop being so hard on yourself and live for now...go to the pool,and date you are never gonna be able to find a mate hiding.....BEST WISHES AND REMEMBER NO ONE IS UGLY WE ARE ALL JUST DIFFERENT AND DIFFERENT LOOKING IN OUR OWN WAYS...SO GET OUT THERE AND LIVE....MUAH...

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Myhighergrounds
Unregistered

Body new
      #101261 - 07/12/04 02:16 AM

Dear friend...
I assume you have seen devastating scenes of kids without limbs, of amazing people who made of their own bodily "disability" an instrument to raise awareness and hope that WE CAN ALL DO SOMETHING against all odds.
I am sure that watching our bodies changing forces acceptance that time goes by or, in our cases, that bodies change in response to other causes. The reality is though that you have a soul and a mind and a uniquess about yourself that cannot be seen, nor can be enhanced by make up or implants, but can be fed by love and respect which come from you first.
Perhaps you have a great opportunity, like many of us, to focus on what you can give to others that is very valuable, unique and priceless. Your body, or sexy legs with sculpted muscles and a nice, healthy figure will gain you a browse from the walker and the occasional thrill of the sexual attraction with someone. Have you ever thought that perhaps your beauty comes from how you live your body not the way your body is physically presented?
And moreover, that body you feel stuck in is your temple, the vehicle you get to learn pleasure and tenderness, pain and soothing care... would you kill a kitty because does not meet the beauty standards? Don't think so... :)
Let's put it down this way: maybe laying down around the pool is not for pick up but to relax your mind...
Oh, forgot the so-beautiful anorexic standard of models, the one we all seem to be pressed by... we walk as zombies, at times with clownish fashionable clothing and accessories and we can't see how unaware we are of ourselves.
Try this exercise: think of having a huge nose, a funny one at times, and others extremely sexy... it's up to you whether you want to project a picture of misery and hilarity or one of acceptance and self-confidence. If you are looking for Mr. Right, I am sure he is waiting for you to show him who you really are...
Be kind to yourself, love your body as a gift to you not an accessory taken for granted... that body will take you to amazing places you only have dreamed of... if only you allow it to be what it is, in its own unique beauty!
Take care!

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elaine_maane
Unregistered

Re: Ugly Body new
      #101265 - 07/12/04 06:39 AM

hello there,
do not feel ugly by no means cause you are not alone.i too felt like that once but not anymore,LOVE URSELF COZ U R SPECIAL.

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Myhighergrounds
Unregistered

Re: Ugly Body new
      #101295 - 07/12/04 05:50 PM

Well, anonymous unregistered...
Lypoathrophy is proved to be not always associated to all drugs, so common would not be a fair adjective to use in this case. Moreover, defining results (I guess you meant side effects of the drug) disgusting in this context is not really helpful, don't you think? :)
I saw more individuals who, in their so called TRENDY style, looked closer to the concept you have of disgusting.
Having a disease or ailment and being scarred or physically affected is not disgusting... it raises awareness on the fact that certain things in life are temporary and do decay, others stay forever, like a positive attitude can be transmitted in this world for generations.
I am adding this in consideration of those who might respond because affected by lypoatrhopy... to me, you are beautiful as always! Cheers!



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Anonymous
Unregistered

Re: Ugly Body new
      #101297 - 07/12/04 06:03 PM

Dear Brother in ugly body, I understand perfectly how you feel, and anything I say is not going to change the way you feel.
I am suffering of "big belly" PI related, I have gone thorough Metformin, Avandia, feeling miserable and ended up in a hospital, I am trying, first to accept me exactlythe way I am, I see myselfin the mirror, full body, big belly and thin legs, and I try to find what in my body is beautiful for me? and focus in that that is beautiful and start to work in the things I do not like, there are other things you can do like visit a plastic surgeon, a dietitian, a counselor.

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Jessie
Guardian

Reged: 06/15/04
Posts: 395
Re: Ugly Body new
      #101347 - 07/13/04 07:42 AM

I am glad that you posted your feelings for us to help. So many people are going through excatly what is happening to you. My hubbie just started meds recently and is having a difficult time with weight gain in odd places(effect from drug cocktail) but you know what, I love him even more for it. You are an amazing person and dont let anyone make you feel any different. We love you and dont care how you look. Dont worry, you are beautiful to us and if we see that beauty just in your words then others outside of that are sure to see it as well. Best of luck to you and you are in my prayers doll. Dont listen to those posts from people who have not a single clue of what they are even saying..........Jessie

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Anonymous
Unregistered

Re: Ugly Body new
      #101405 - 07/13/04 11:05 PM

This is a typical side effect of toxic 'AIDS meds'. In some cases the results can make you almost want to vomit.

You will see.

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Anonymous
Unregistered

Re: Ugly Body new
      #101406 - 07/13/04 11:06 PM

....and it will get worse.

Haart is haartless!

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Anonymous
Unregistered

Re: Ugly Body new
      #101472 - 07/14/04 08:55 PM

In addition to this bulletin board, you might also want to join the Lipodystrophy Group, where people share a lot of helpful information on this subject. Just send a blank e-mail to
lipodystrophy-subscribe@yahoogroups.com
and you will receive instructions to follow.
Best of luck to you!


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Anonymous
Unregistered

Re: Ugly Body new
      #101598 - 07/16/04 03:42 PM

A typical side effect of AIDS meds that gets worse and worse. The end resullt can be quite disgusting.

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Anonymous
Unregistered

Re: Ugly Body new
      #102370 - 07/22/04 11:40 AM

It isn't easy just know that some people out there arent shallow and love you for you not love you for how you look

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