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HIV Transmission and Education >> Am I Infected?

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Anonymous
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Totally Consumed
      #80426 - 01/10/04 10:48 AM

I am fearful of testing for hiv, the consequesnes are just so detrimental that I cannot face them. I am 45, married, 3 children. I have engaged in sexual acts with prostitutes for the last 3 yrs. I was tested once 2 yrs ago, neg. Since then I have protected myself during intercourse, but not during oral (recieving). What really set me off was 3 months I sensed a strange liquid coming from a womans nipple. She was not nursing, so I couldn't understand what it was. That got me thinking about my wreckless actions for the past 2 yrs. My biggest concern is recieving oral. I know this is a low risk activity. I have developed sores in my mouth, it's not thrush, or ohl, but it clears up, and then comes back. Those are my only symptoms. Any advise? Please don't judge, I've beat myself up pretty bad already. This consumes my life.........
Thanks for reading.



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Anonymous
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Re: Totally Consumed new
      #80427 - 01/10/04 12:54 PM

Have you been tested for STDs other than HIV? From the sounds of it, HIV isn't much of a risk for you, but there's any number of other diseases -- herpes, syphilis -- that are easier to get than HIV and can cause problems like unusual discharge, sores and the like.

I completely understand the guilt you probably feel right now, but please consider how much worse that guilt could be if you -don't- get tested (and treated) for whatever viruses you may have picked up. What if you infect your wife? What if she gets sick? What if you get sick? What if, god forbid, you -do- have HIV, and you're too afraid to find out? What happens to you, your wife and your kids then?

You've been through a lot, and you've had to go through it alone, and that's terrible enough as it is. Don't let this get any worse -- go get tested, and talk to someone (maybe a psychologist or someone else you know and trust) about how you can start thinking about how to tell your wife about all this.

Kind Wishes,
H



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Anonymous
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Re: Totally Consumed new
      #80546 - 01/11/04 03:14 AM

There is no risk in receiving oral at all since HIV is not found in saliva. As far as the fluid from the breast, this is not uncommon some women do that when they are sexually aroused. Dude, you need to stop visiting hookers. Your poor wife. I think you need counselling to deal with the issues on why you visit hookers in the first place. If you are scared of HIV screwing hookers is not the thing to do. However a condom will usually protect you.



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Anonymous
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Re: Totally Consumed new
      #80550 - 01/11/04 10:30 AM

Thank you for the response......I am seeking a counselor.



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