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HIV Transmission and Education >> Am I Infected?

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Cajunman
Member

Reged: 02/21/03
Posts: 22
Tested waiting on Results
      #59484 - 02/26/03 10:23 AM

Well I just did a home Access test and sent it off. This is 80 days(11 weeks + a few days) after my possible exposure(unprotected Vaginal).
I still have swollen nodes in my neck, armpit, and groin. I also have pains in my elbows and knees. I guess these could be lymphs aswell. I just don't feel right. I have not had all the things I read about of others, but I feel as though these symptoms going on for over 2 months now are definately a reason to prepare myself for a positive result. I have racked my brain trying to prepare myself and all that will come with it in the initial pain and shock of me having to tell my family. Not sure how that will all turn out. I feel like I am worrying about what this will mean for so many others instead of what it means for me.
I am just continually distraut. My lymphs are not just swollen on one side etc, they seem to be swollen all over, although they are not visible they are swollen as I have an uncomfortable like pressure feeling in all those areas.
I occasionally get panicky and try too calm myself but usually does not work.
I guess this is happening to me for a reason. I know I will never take things for granted anymore. I will get past this eventually and do all I can to help others, even in that small chance i am neg. I will not ever look the other way, this experience although still new to me has changed my thinking considerably. I wish you all the best and if you are worrying about a low to no risk encounter STOP.
If anyone has had a similar sitution after unprotected encounter please talk to me. I am not lookin for a get out of jail free card, I know this is quite real.
Thanks to all the folks on this forum for all you do. I will get my results next week and will post. If I can bring myself to call the number, I am so aprehensive about what I have too face.
Thanks for listening



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Anonymous
Unregistered

Re: Tested waiting on Results new
      #59486 - 02/26/03 12:32 PM

Hi I too am testing tomorrow & get my results on Monday. I have been in a panic sleepless terrible state for the whole of the window period. Slowly counting down the days until I can test. Now that I can test I almost want to extend the window period again. However we both know the only way we can move on in our lives is to know the result. God-willing they will be good results. Its funny how clearly you can see things when suddenly the only thing that is of true value to us – our health is under threat of being taken away. How to get through this all? Personally I made up a word document with positive stories & outcomes re people who did the same activity as me & who wound up negative. Anytime I was worried I would call up this sheet & try & get my risk into perspective.
I am scared of going to get the blood out tomorrow – never mind going for my results on Monday.
Another thing I do when I am feeling low & scared is remember this quote from Shakespeare’s Julius Ceaser
“ Cowards die many times before their deaths;
the valiant never taste of death but once”

Good luck to us all & remember there are people rooting for what I am sure will be your neg result.
Peace.




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Anonymous
Unregistered

Re: Tested waiting on Results new
      #59489 - 02/26/03 02:42 PM

I'm due to have my test next monday 4th, im in the uk so will then have to wait 5 days for result, i have to say the last two weeks in particular have been agonising (Im in the no to low risk cat as per Jackie) i have had some symptons - Flu, swollen gland on left side, serious sweating during the day, the last week or so I have had pains in my right arm going up to my collar bone, I can't stop thinking about what I would say to my family if i have caught this, I'm married and seen as a good husband but I have found myself in a position where I could have recked alot of lives due to my ten minutes of drunken madness (lessen for me there) I wish the other 2 people on here all the best and hope we are clear and can move on



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Anonymous
Unregistered

Re: Tested waiting on Results new
      #59538 - 02/27/03 08:12 AM

Well, as for my personal experience after my bout of unprotected sex with an hiv positive person this is what happend.: 3 weeks after the encounter ( mind you hiv never entered my head before that ) i started feeling fatigue, my lymphs got swollen and i had a constant low grade fever with headache and night sweats. This went for at least a week where i went to the doctor and he said i had faryngitis and gave me some medicine and sent me home, except i didnt get better. so i got into the cmputer looked at symptoms i had and aids always came out as a possibler culprit. My nightmare then begun. I called the person i was with and begged for him to perform a test of which he said ok. I tested negative at one month. The person started to lie to me about not being able to test,, he had no time, he had a cold, etc. etc. I knew then he was positive. So i traveled to the US, with my girlfreind and went to get a series of tests. they tested me again for hiv but i was still in the window period and still negatve. and none of the other tests they tested me for ( even a lymph node biopsy) came out positive which gave me the assurance at that time that it had to be hiv. At the same time my girlfriend got the worst flu of her life! which knocked her in bed and i was sure i had infected her as well. To make this shorter at the end it was nothing. Probably a bug i caught that has no name yet, and surely even though everything i felt was real and the fevers and lympnodes swelling were real they were probably produced by my constant thinking i had hiv. Your body is capable of making you sick if you believe it.

Now days a 6 weeks test is almost certain you are in the clear and at a month negative test a doctor will tell you its most probably not hiv. Plus you had vaginal sex which is more difucult to transmit from woman to man than from mna to woman. so take care be careful next time. your gonna be fine



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Cajunman
Member

Reged: 02/21/03
Posts: 22
Re: Tested waiting on Results new
      #59548 - 02/27/03 10:04 AM

Well, your experience sounds similar to mine. I did not have low grade fever at all though, as far as I know(I guess low grade fever means a fever just not real high, correct?). I feel pressure in lymphs throughout my body though, they are really strange, never had this feeling in my life. Just seems as if something has grabbed a hold of me. I just canot understand if this is not HIV what could it be. I only wish it were not. I canot bring myself to beleive it is something else with what I have read about swollen lymphs being a hallmark sign of HIV. I guess my test results will tell me. I am very apprehensive about getting results though, because once I find out for sure I will have to make some real difficult decisions. Too bad i did not think about what type of decision I was making when I got myself in this predicament. Strange how we are so shallow when it comes to making mistakes, although we know the right answer we choose to mark the incorrect one.
Just curios why you had to come to the US to be tested. Not that it really matters.
Thanks for your words, I hope you are right about me making myself sick and it is not HIV.
Regardless the outcome I have learned more in the last 11 and a half weeks about this disease, I will never ever pass up the chance to help someone else out if it is in my power.



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Anonymous
Unregistered

Re: Me Again new
      #59576 - 02/28/03 09:16 AM

First of all I came to the US because i live in South America and the technology is much better there than here. Plus it could have been another desease that i would have perferred to begin treatment there than here.
I was in a state of complete panic all the time. I managed to tell my parents that lived there and telling somebdoy helped. i cried all the time i couldnt sleep, i had a constant stiff neck and my armpits and elbows hurt all the time and also my groin. my tounge was so white i could write my name on it if i could. I kniew for sure at that time it was hiv. After i did all kinds of tests and even a western blot at 6 weeks the doctors found nothing and i went home with the instructions of a follow up test in another 6 weeks and then in 3 more months. I never had a pcr or viral load tests etc. because i had told the doctors i had had vaginal sex instead of msm. When i got back home i went to a psychiatrist to help me deal with the anxiety. He gave me paxil, xanax to sleep and i saw him 3 times a week untilthe 3 months came by and then the 6 month test. (at that time the window period was 6 months ). What we have is called OCD Obssessive Compulsive Disorder, we make ourselves sick believing we are sick. The symtoms the lymphniodes are all real things going on in our bodies. we get fever and wake up at night soked in sweat usually at 2 or 3 in the morning. The problem with this disorder is to believe in it and not transfwer the fear to another sickness after you find out you dont have hiv. example next believing you have cancer or somethin like that. It took me more than a year to release myself from whole fear of the desease. and to be comfortable to have sex again without thinking i was going to become infected or infect somebody.
I hope this all wasnt so confusing.




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Anonymous
Unregistered

Re: Tested waiting on Results new
      #60434 - 03/10/03 06:59 PM

I was wondering to myself how the test results for Cajunman turned out?



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