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HIV Transmission and Education >> Am I Infected?

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Anonymous
Unregistered

didn't know..
      #30835 - 03/29/02 02:56 PM

I had a sexual relationship with a man at work for 8 months I slept with him twice in July and then it started again in mid December up until March 4 was my last sexual encounter. Two days after he told me that he was hiv positive and that he had it for 7 years. I was devastated for I loved this man............I had protected sex with him the whole time as soon as he told me I got tested and then 16 days after the last encounter I got tested again and they both came out negative. I will test again next week on April 3rd I am so scared that I will pop up positive my doctor and my hiv counselor and his doctor have assured me that I am okay. But, why does it feel like it won't be I am getting tested again on June 4 that will make it three months. His doctor said that he is a non-progressor and that it is highly unlikley to get it through deep kissing I am emotionally distraught by this my life has collapsed as I wait to get retested. I guess I'm on here for some supoort and reassurance. Are my last two tests good indicators?



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Anonymous
Unregistered

Re: didn't know.. new
      #30836 - 03/29/02 03:24 PM

I am so sorry this happened to you. It was unfair of this man not to tell you his status. You used condoms...and if kissing was your only body fluid exchange with this man..then you are probably ok. I know "probably" is a horrible word at this point...but the odds are in your favor. Hang in there...everybody here will be there for you!



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Bottom Line
Unregistered

Re: didn't know.. new
      #30837 - 03/29/02 03:47 PM

Sounds like low risk to me even though he is HIV positive.

More importantly than your doctor, what did you lawyer say?





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Jackie_Blue
Legend

Reged: 10/26/00
Posts: 2028
Re: didn't know.. new
      #30840 - 03/29/02 04:23 PM

I know this must really have pulled the rug out from you...to put it mildly.

The good news is that you used condoms. Studies show that in serodiscordant couples that use condoms the rate of transmission is very, very, very, extremely low.

Another factor for transmission is how high is the viral load. Of course the fact you used condoms means he could have a very high viral load and your risk would still be small. But to continue. The higher the viral load the higher the risk in unprotected sex.

BUT the good news is that he is a long term non-progressor. That means his body is fighting the virus just fine and keeping his viral load either non-dectectable or very low.

Right now the best people for you to be listening to are your doctor, your hiv counselor and his doctor.

Make sure you take extra care of yourself during this time. Stress and anxiety can really put a hurting on a person's body. Eat right, get rest, exercise A LOT (best thing for stress), pamper yourself. You get the picture.

Hang in there
J.



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worried2002.
Unregistered

Re: didn't know.. new
      #30841 - 03/29/02 04:26 PM

Well, needless to say, he should have told you beforehand. The fact you used condoms reduced your risk to almost zero. We are all keeping fingers crossed for you, everything will be ok. Let us know. Hugs

----
Worried2002



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Anonymous
Unregistered

Re: didn't know.. new
      #30859 - 03/29/02 08:40 PM

I definitly agree with Bottom Line. I think this guy should be locked away. It dosent matter if he used condoms the fact that he had HIV and didnt tell you for 8 months is inexusable. What if the condom had broken? What then? He put your health at risk just because he wanted to get laid and that makes him extremely selfish and deceitful. Contact your lawyer so he dosent do this to anyone else again.



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Anonymous
Unregistered

Re: didn't know.. new
      #31016 - 04/01/02 10:08 AM

Hi JackieBlue,

Thanks for looking at my post. I don't know what to do I'm getting another test this week I'm getting so crazy. I'm even thinking suicide.........(I'm serious when I say this) his doctor said his viral load is undetectable. Do you know what this means? And, I keep thinking if anything spilled over the base of the condom. I am completely ruined by this everyone notices at work that I'm not myself. And, each day that goes by I think of ways I would take my life. I am going to counseling but no matter what anyone tells me it doesn't help my feelings.



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