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HIV Transmission and Education >> Am I Infected?

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Klara
Unregistered

experience to share
      #2567 - 04/04/00 11:30 PM

I just want to share my experience with everyone here because like many others,I also got quite a tremendous amount of support while I was going through the HIV window period...

I am a 25 year old female that engaged in oral sex with a man that I did not know well.. I "deep-throated" him a couple of times but ended the act when I suddenly came to my senses. He did not cum. (I recently broke up with boyfriend.. kind of a way at getting back at him.. I was stupid at that point in time)

After that, I began noticing every little thing my body was going through. It began with my armpits where I thought I felt my lymph nodes.. (but the fact is that I touched it so many times that it became irritated..)

Then after, I began noticing my tongue and bumps that it had.. The tongue looked like it had a white-ish coating in the back and had bumps at the very back of the tongue.. I started to freak out.. I thought that I had thrush. This went on for most of my 6 months waiting period.. But then the fact of the matter is that I never really had the chance to analyse by tongue before the incident. Therefore, everything I looked at freaked me out. Its normal to have a little white-ish coating on the back of the tongue and also the bumps on the very back of the tongue is normal.. its part of the anatomy of a regular tongue..

I also noticed joint pains and muscle aches.. But what I didn't realise at that time was the any person can have joint or muscle pain, but just dismiss it. However when I had HIV on the back of my mind, I kept on thinking about the muscle/joint pain which made it worse.. Most people just don't even bothering thinking about it..

It got to a point where I thought my hair was falling out.. I saw strands of hair on the bathroom floor and thought that the HIV was causing my hair-loss.. but you know what.. everyone loses hair regularly.. its not a big deal!!

Basically what I want to tell readers of this forum is that your mind can play alot of tricks on you. Thinking back, if I had to do this over again, I am still not sure that I can overcome my brain's imagination... but please try to be as logical as you can if you are waiting for your 6 months result. I know that its hard and you can't stop thinking about the possibility of HIV going through and taking over your body.. but the only advice I can give is to please try not over analyse yourself.. It will just make your life harder to live..

I am fortunate to say that my 6 months result came back negative and I just want to tell everyone out there to PLEASE practice safer sex. I realise what I did was considered a rather low-risk activity, but still there is risk. I have learned alot from this experience and I hope that people out there could grasp the idea of how important safer sex is without going through what I had to.

Take care everyone!





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swilli
Newbie

Reged: 08/18/04
Posts: 1
Re: experience to share new
      #109951 - 08/18/04 11:43 AM

Klara thank you so much. I recently had both a yeast infection and vaginosis. So the doctor gave me diflucan and metronidazole. A couple of days ago I realized that I had a white coating on my tongue. Yesterday was the day that I had my GYN appointment. I mentioned to the Dr. that my tongue was white, and he said that happens after antibiotics. But as I looked at my tongue in the car, I saw these raised bumps on the back of the tongue. And girl I freaked out. I didn't know what to do. I was driving home hysterically and crying. I called my primary care physician crying, and they told me to come right away. I told them I believe I have HIV because the day before I had been doing research and saw that the first signs of HIV were thrush and hairy leuokoplates or something like that. So I just paniced. My doctor looked down my throat and said that I have a coated tongue, possibly from the medicine that I took. He also said that he didn't see any sores on the back of my tongue. And I told him I see them. I took my HIV test and I am nervously waiting for the results. I told my boyfriend who is possibly going to get his results back today. I just didn't know what to do. I couldn't sleep at all last night. This morning I got online and decided to look up bumps on the back of the tongue, and to my suprise, I found that was normal. And that's how I discovered your posting. I feel somewhat better. But I'm not out of the woods yet. I am praying to God that everything will be ok. I am so nervous. But I would like to thank you. Your posting and others that I have read have given me hope and a new form of inspiration. Regardless of the outcome I vow that I will change my life. I just hope that I will be given the life to change. Thank you.

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