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Feared
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Which is the risk? Gay top cut?
#255882 - 05/27/11 12:34 PM
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I would like to know which is the risk at my situation. I am gay male (29) who has been active in gay sex for at least 10 years. Last test I took in Dec. '10 was negative and I don't take risk practices.
However, on April 9 something different happened.
I was flying two long-haul flights and in my long stop-over in a major European capital, I decided to go to the center and jump to a gay sauna (Sunday early morning). I usually go to saunas / sex clubs in Europe and Asia having protected sex.
Probably because of jet-lag and horniness, I had unprotected sex in the sauna. This is the basic data:
- I was top
- I am circumcised (cut)
- I was quite "horny", horny enough to not stay more than 30/60 seconds "inside" before I cum. When I cam I just took my tool out. It was very quick.
- I feel the guy was pretty easy to get in... probably he had been penetrated before. My penis is more like large size (I would say) and I didn't have major problems, so I feel that it didn't touch the ass skin a lot (probably he had been lubered). Also when taking it out it didn't have traces (feces, blood).
- I have been looking at my penis and I can't see any injury or cut.
Which are the risks about getting HIV in this situation?
I talked about this to the only friend that I have who is declared HIV+ (at least to me) and he told that I should take the test but the risk was definitely on the low side in my situation.
I travel quite a lot internationally for travel, so at the moment it is not handy to have HIV test, especially considering that most of my trips are in countries (and the country where I live) where they would deport any HIV+ foreigner.
I will be back for holiday in my home country in Western Europe (so no PB with HIV tests there) in the first week of June. Would it be length enough to take the test? From April 9 to early June? For what I have read, three months are recommended.
I am also wondering why the guy in the first had unprotected sex with me (been him the bottom). I felt that the guy was probably on drugs/alcohol (as I told, this was one of the largest European cities on Sunday early morning; so most people came directly from clubs). I also wondered if he is just HIV+ and he is looking to transmit it.
Any advise welcomed, I am very worried. Thanks.
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Starboy
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Hi Hope you test neg. I think 3 month then 6 month tests would confirm your status. I would say most men dont go to those places to transmit there HIV, They ,if infected or not, are just as horny as you.
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Feared
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Thanks for the quick reply.
I had about 2 years ago unprotected sex (bottom) with a "friend" that I knew for quite a long time, and despite it is a more risky situation, I was not that afraid when taking the test.
Now I am very afraid because despite being a bit less risky situation (top), I didn't know this person at all.
Even if my HIV+ friend assured me that the risk of getting HIV being top (and cut; in most Western European countries being cut is not the norm) exists, but it is way lower than being bottom (he showed some statics from the Internet, and apparently risk was like 10 times less).
I know it is not about statics ('cos you can always be on the 0,xx% whatever percentage), yet somehow I think it would help me to calm before doing the test.
So I understand that taking the test two months after the relation is useless? Should I wait for the 3-month?
Thanks,
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kicker
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I have no idea what penile size has to do with anything or whether the guy was "loose" or not for that matter either. I would say nothing at all. As well just because you didn't see a cut doesn't mean there wasn't one. As well just because you didn't see any blood doesn't mean there wasn't any.
Remember to see blood cells you need a microscope, and for that matter to see HIV you need an electron microscope because the virus is much smaller than a blood cell.
Anyway, your risk is still significant enough to warrant testing. Odds are in your favor, but as you said you could fall inside the percentage. Random encounters with people that you do not know their status bumps up the odds than someone you do know the status of positive or negative.
I had an ID doctor; giving a very good presentation on HIV; say that he would rather have unprotected sex with someone who is positive and on meds than someone who he didn't know the status of, because statistically it's safer.
My advice test now, if it's negative than you have a good chance when you go back at the three month mark it will still be negative.
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Hi kicker, thanks for the advice.
Well, nothing to do with size. I just was wondering if having a "tough" penetration (with more brushes, etc.) would make the transmission more likely to happen than just having a "loose" penetration where somehow the contact is less aggressive. I hope I have explained myself!
Yep. I was planning to test anyway in the second week of June when back to Europe. It would be just about 70 days after the unfortunate encounter. I just was not sure whether it was really necessary to wait for the 90 days period.
Thanks,
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