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HIV Transmission and Education >> Am I Infected?

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roma2010
All Star

Reged: 07/23/10
Posts: 85
i know im infected i don't believe my tests.
      #251610 - 08/13/10 10:48 AM

as much as i try to believe my tests results i can't my tongue still burns and i can see the imprints of my teeth on the side of it i keep getting new moles and freckles on my face and body, now im seeing several really small white dots on my arms, i can't stop sweating i keep loosing weight even though i try to eat really well yesterday i went to see a GI specialist and he told me that whatever it is that i have is not due to just a simple stomach problem he put it simply like this a stomach problem wouldn't cause any skin problems at all so i told him all my symptoms and right away he suggested an hiv test, dunno what to do anymore im going crazy starting to have crazy thoughts again, im really depressed i can't stop crying and to top it all off this morning i woke up at 4 am with a killing pain in my back went to the ER got a scan on my stomach and they found a kidney stone i told the Dr about the symptoms i have been having for the last couple of months and she said that they have nothing to do with having a kidney stone ..anyways i know im infected i have symptoms that no other people have from what i have read here nobody has mentioned anything about skin problems like dermatofibromas according to doctor Natterstad 50% of the people with hiv will have some sort of skin problem whether is a rash, freckles, moles, dermatofibromas or any skin problem .. this is the way i see it i have always been a healthy person never had any major issues it cannot be purely coincidental that after i slept with this chick i started getting all these symptoms which i have never felt or seen before in my life, doctors and counselors tell me that if i didn't have fever, diarrhea, or vomiting that is no hiv, that's not true Dr Natterstad says that acute symptoms can mimic those symptoms of a flu or any other virus so not necessarily i would have to have fever and all of those.....the one major symptoms that nobody here has mentioned is this, when i started having stomach problems i also had some problems with my skin i had a couple of places in both hands were my skin would raise up looked kinda like a mosquito bite but in the morning the were gone just leaving a scar i still get those but really small ones but now my skin doesn't raise anymore it just looks like a scar but several ones on my back. arms and legs really small ones..i wonder what could cause such a thing? a virus like hiv and the reason the were so big at first is because is when the virus had a SPIKE and now that only 2% is in my blood they come out everywhere but just small ones..so yeah i know im infected and i know there's no going back i just hope i have the strength to cope and deal with this but i doubt it..i know the disease might not kill me but the depression and anxiety will , i have no friends, nobody to talk to and to make matters worse i just started getting all my hospital bills and i have no money ...i really really would rather be dead right now but the problem is that i don't have the balls to do anything about it and i know i won't ..

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bartlebyAdministrator
Admin

Reged: 01/19/10
Posts: 660
Re: i know im infected i don't believe my tests. new
      #251611 - 08/13/10 12:19 PM

hey roma,

listen, you don't have hiv, ok? you tested negative outside of the window period. the girl you slept with also tested negative at 11 weeks, which is a conclusive result.

you're being really irrational and paranoid by not believing your test results. it's not a coincidence that all these symptoms came up after you slept with her. Because that's when you started worrying 24/7 about all this. you started noticing every little thing on your body, symptoms that may not have really been symptoms, reading up daily on a disease you don't have.

a lot of people have gone through and will go through what you're experiencing.

here's an example of obsessive testing because of symptoms: http://www.thebody.com/Forums/AIDS/SafeSex/Archive/Testing/Q207188.html.

Please don't make the same mistake. Yes, all these problems you're experiencing with your body are very real, but it's not HIV.

Not sure where you live, but see if you can find a support group for depression or anxiety!


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Bartleby at The Body
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Jackie__Blue
Legend

Reged: 01/20/07
Posts: 1186
Re: i know im infected i don't believe my tests. new
      #251612 - 08/13/10 01:13 PM

Wanna know what's worse than having HIV? Refusing to believe the test results that prove you don't have HIV.

Since you are now at a point you will refuse to listen to reason there is no point discussing this with you any longer.

I sincerely hope that you come to your senses before you completely destroy your life. Meanwhile...enjoy the crazy.

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jrob123
Member

Reged: 08/05/10
Posts: 16
Re: i know im infected i don't believe my tests. new
      #251643 - 08/16/10 01:24 AM


I am hoping I am in your same shoes, as I to am having a lot of symptoms and don't know the reasons why? I have only had 2 tests but both were after two weeks exsposure. One NAAT and one antibody test both negative..

I read on this website. that anxiety could be a cause of many symptoms. maybe you wanna check it out

http://www.anxietycentre.com/anxiety-symptoms.shtml

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roma2010
All Star

Reged: 07/23/10
Posts: 85
Re: i know im infected i don't believe my tests. new
      #251663 - 08/16/10 06:46 PM

im not speculating i know im infected, my face looks so skinny and i look and feel terribly ill, my tongue has a really thick white coat on it and i can see teeth marks on the side it also burns specially on the tip, i have numerous new moles and freckles on face, arms hands, and some on my legs i also saw a new freckle like on the head of my penis which i know i never had, have dermatofibromas on my back, i have raised skin on several spots on my hands that look like mosquito bites but usually go away at night when i wake up i don't see them anymore and is not my imagination i showed to my doctor and he said he didn't know what it was, i have a lot of white dots on my left arm, and also a big spot like two inches long that look as if i would've burnt myself but i didn't and that appear just a few days ago, i have a a white blotch on my left palm the size of a dime and it's been there for over a month, i have problems falling asleep i feel as if i had bug crawling inside my brain and i have repetitive thoughts in my brain and i can't stop it it's like my brain is working on its own i can't concentrate on anything usually if i drive for more than 20 minutes my head starts pounding really bad and hurts like hell, my eyes itch a lot and i feel pintching pain in them, i still have some nausea sometimes, i feel like im hungry but when i start to eat i feel full right away . i ask myself what could be causing this problems? and of course only a virus or some sort bacteria in the blood that's why i have the same skin problem in different spots if they were in just one spot i wouldn't worry but they are all over and of course only a virus or bacteria would travel this fast nothing else....besides when i slept with this chick i didn't even worry about stds because she seemed honest when i asked her about stds so i wasn't thinking about it, until i started feeling sick like over a month later my very very first symptom was a hot flash while i was having dinner one day and then i felt another one a few days later at work then i noticed a lot of pimples on my back right behind both my armpits but i didn't put much thought into it because i was feeling perfectly fine. so skin problems have been there since the very beggining..anyways i know im infected ..it sucks but i guess it was bound to happen sooner or later i have always had sex outside of my marriage except that this time i was very unlucky to have a condom breakage(the only one time that it broke) ...sucks..

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