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HIV Transmission and Education >> Am I Infected?

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Anonymous
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Feel like running away!!
      #219743 - 12/24/06 03:28 PM

Please give me some advice. I and older married guy in my 50's. I have two teenage children. All of my family are strong Christians and I believe too, yet had an affair about 3 months ago. I've been so sick, fever, night sweets, fatique. I got tested a 9 weeks came back negative, but I know there is a window and I'm still sick. If I'm positive this is going to ruin my life and family. I'm thinking about leaving and moving to another city so I wouldn't shame them. My wife has a lot of amily and I know she'd be taken care of. I know this sounds terrible.. but don't want my kids to face the shame of a dad who dies of AIDS. Is this so wrong of me... Thank you for your help

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Anonymous
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Re: Feel like running away!! new
      #219819 - 12/25/06 10:04 AM

It's Christmas, so I'll be charitable.

"but don't want my kids to face the shame of a dad who dies of AIDS. "

This is the attitude that people living with HIV have to deal with from many people that haven't bothered to look beyond the stigma and fear of HIV. Your concern about the shame displays a needless, cold, unchristian attitude about people living with HIV. Now might be a good time to really think about "There, but for the Grace of God, go I".

I can assure you that my kids are not ashamed of me or my husband. They aren't because I am not ashamed of myself. I have a virus. Not a scarlett letter.

If you feel shame, then that means you have gone past your comfort boundaries, but perhaps you can use this all as a lesson in humility.

Now about that 9 week negative.

A 6 week negative while not yet considered conclusive, is considered extremely accurate of your status. About 98% of people that are HIV+ will test postive by 6 weeks. SO that 9 week negative isn't going to change. Test at 3 months to put this matter to rest, but your result won't change. I would suggest you start dealing with the fact you DON'T have HIV.

EC

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Anonymous
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Re: Feel like running away!! new
      #219826 - 12/25/06 11:53 AM

Yikes!! you need to calm down. You do not have HIV you 9 week test is all you need. Ghezzz do some reading will ya, the window period of 3 months is B/S. You do not have HIV. What you are is guilt ridden. Ya know, there are lots of things we do in life we woulnd't do again if given the chance. Your indiscretion on a scale of 1/10 isn't really that high so give yourself a break and enjoy Christmas with your family.

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Anonymous
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Re: Feel like running away!! new
      #219832 - 12/25/06 12:07 PM

Your concern about the shame displays a needless, cold, unchristian attitude about people living with HIV.
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Not so. I am not the poster however I can understand a married man with a family feeling that way. He is not saying anything about others living with HIV he is saying how it would affect him and his relationship with his love one's.
Acquiring HIV takes certain behavior therfore it would only be normal to feel as he does. BTW that would pertain to Gay couples as well. I represents straying from a committed relationship.

I would also hope that all people with HIV infection would not be looked upon different than others with any infection. It certainly is moving in that direction. Merry Christmas.

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Anonymous
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Re: Feel like running away!! new
      #219865 - 12/25/06 06:58 PM

Thank you for your response. Please I'm not downing anyone with HIV... I'm praying for them. I just don't know what to do. symptoms are finally easing up and this is when I heard the antibodies will show up. It's been 11 weeks now.. Tested at 9 and still had symptoms. I just figured if I would leave my family would be better off and can move on with their lives without me. I DON"T KNOW WHAT TO DO

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Anonymous
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Re: Feel like running away!! new
      #219883 - 12/25/06 10:02 PM

We have told you what to do. If you don't believe it go see a shrink or do what ever!!

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