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PLEASE HELP EX BF Had sex with a SEX WORKER
#111032 - 08/30/04 12:04 PM
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Someone please answer my questions- my EX bf had sex with a sex worker in Spain when he was on a cruise to Bahrain he's in the navy... this was back in Nov - we got together around May and had sex several times - mostly protected but with 2-4 times when the condom broke - He says that it was protected sex - in fact swore and also swore that he had just had a physical (he said he has one every six months) for the navy and that they drew blood and he's sure he was tested for HIV -
Should I believe him? Does anyone know if they test for HIV with yearly physicals- Also does anyone know of or slept with a sex worker in Spain - are they regulated as they are in other countries in Europe?
He never told me this until the day we broke up - which is why I broke up with him... and now that 4 weeks and 2 days after our last "encounter" I have developed a mild but not painful sore throat and laryngitis... Some mucus but not a lot - its worse at night...
If anyone can help me that would be great...!!!!!!!
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Being a former Marine, yes I can tell you that HIV tests are manditory. I will also tell you that he had free access to condoms on his ship and that before he docked in Spain, he was given the HIV/Aids ratio's for that part of the world before he went on Liberty. I do not remember if Spain was regulated as far a sex workers. I never paid for sex in Spain before. Actually, I didn't have too. But, in all likelihood, you are OK. So I will leave you with two pieces of advice:
Test at 12 - 13 weeks for HIV.
DO NOT research HIV on the Internet until after you test. You will drive yourself crazy.
Good Luck
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Thanks for your reply. So coming off of deployment you guys have to get tested? He keeps telling me about physicals and being tested but I thought the military only required a test every 2 years? I know this might sound naive but I want to believe him and just put my mind at ease - but now I have a sore throat and laryngitis and I'm a little uneasy.
Had I known all this before hand I wouldn't have put myself in this position.
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I would not necesarily stand behind the statement "When I came off deployment." I remember getting thoroughly checked out prior to going to Gulf War I. I also remember that everybody would have to get HIV screenings based on what ever means the military choose at that time, meaning alphabetical, or some other way.
What you could do is write his commander a letter. Explain that you feel like you have been potientially exposed by your former boyfriend. You can bet that the Navy will make him test. Believe me that the military reacts to letters people send about individual sailors, Marines, soldiers and Airmen. They have to. However, if you choose to do that, you will REALLY screw with his Navy career. If you have a legitimate concern, you may want to pursue that. If you are a jilted lover, that would be taking it too far. I would also be tempted to do an HIV test of my own before I involve the Navy. Even if it is within the 12 week window, it will be a great indicator of what the final result will be. Most people seroconvert within 6 weeks and ELISA test used to be considered conclusive after 30 days. The CDC decided to increase the testing window due to the explosion of infection rates. Which makes complete sense given population factors. I think that should test after 12 weeks, see your negative results, breath a sigh of relief and go after a Marine.
A Sailor of all things, I mean really;-)
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Ha ha well that was my first and last rel. with a sailor - I mean a sex worker - really... I mean I've been to Spain before and I mean I'm thinking last resort...
And I did do a tad of investigating on my own - according to the people that I talked to they do have physicals 6 months - and are tested for every STD after a cruise...
But you're right I should just either believe him or get tested on my own -
and no I'm not the jilted lover - I'm the disgusted lover - I mean - damn pay for sex? ew
:) Thanks.
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Well,
We all pay for sex. To some extent. My wife is the most expensive date I have ever had:-)
Good Luck.
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I am in the militarty myself, and I was just over there in the middle east; thus, I know how they screen for HIV. Anyway, the army do screen you for it but they don't seem to consider much about the window period. I remember when a whole bunch of soldiers had sex with prostitutes a week before leaving. Well, of course, the test came out negative whether they got infected or not because the window period of 3 months was not considered. Nonetheles, thankfully, no one got infected with HIV, although a couple in the unit got herpes.
Just ask your bf how long after he had sex with the prostitute he got his blood drawn. If it is within 3 months, make him go take an annyomous test through the civilian dr.
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forget
#111049 - 08/30/04 08:39 PM
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forget about the bf and his tests and whether to believe him or not. It's your health. its your body. get yourself tested.
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