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Scared and waiting
#1016 - 03/30/00 10:49 PM
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Scared and Waiting Results:
Hi, I recently had a one night fling with a co-worker (hetero) I am married and love my wife very much. I had been drinking and ended up in a very regrettable situation. I am trying to resolve my problems with my wife and to address my drinking problem but my concern over HIV has overwelmed everything. About two weeks after the encounter I developed a severe sore throat for about two days. It has continued to nag me since then. About 6.5 weeks after the encounter I noticed two cottage cheese like lesions on my tongue. They were easily removed and I gargled with a peroxide based gargle which apparently prevented the return. I have been terified that the lesions were thrush. I had and a qual PCR at 1 month which was negative and an Antibody test at 7 weeks which was negative. I should be encouraged but I cant shake the thought that for some reason my body is not dealing with the infection and that I might be dead by the time of the three month test. I have had none of the more common seroconversion symptoms (fever, chills, myalgia, swollen glands etc) I am overwelmed with guilt and fear. Any comments would be appreciated.
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I know what you're going through. I recently had a 12.5 week test which was negative, and I'm still having difficulty convincing myself that I'll be OK. The odds are overwhelmingly in my favour at this point, but the guilt keeps the anxiety level up, even though my exposure was not considered "high risk". If I take into account my relative risk level, and the 12.5 week negative, I shouldn't be as worried as I am.
The one thing that HAS helped is counciling. You may want to give it a try. I suspect the root cause of your problems isn't specifically a worry about HIV infection, but something else.
This coming Thursday is 16 weeks for me. I'm fighting off the urge to get tested again, and instead wait for the full 26 weeks, and put this whole thing behind me.
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