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question for the guys
      #90870 - 03/01/04 08:28 AM

I engaged in receptive oral with a few men thru a website while in a different city from where i live. I always ask everyone if they are "poz" before we meet, as I think this "knowing" term will get them to be more likely to be honest with me. I do not receive anal intercourse, and don't give either, although I have given a couple times using a condom. I was with a gay man (partnered but cheating) who said he was neg. I did get a good amt. of ejaculate in my mouth, and, since the bathroom was not close, I had to hold it for 15 seconds before i could spit and rinse it out. I didnt swallow, though a tiny bit could have touched the back of my throat. I was using poppers, as well, which may irritate the back of the throat (?) It did not feel irritated. I had no known cuts in the mouth, and no chips were consumed that day. I always almost don't even brush the teeth before meeting someone. He told me he was negative, and I just went on his word. 10-14 days after the meeting, I felt a fatigued feeling, then went to bed, followed by a gaseous feeling in the morning, whcih turned into a slight fever, and mainly stomach-based problems with higher temperatures -- NEVER had night sweats, though. While the glands under the jaw did enlarge, i never felt the ones in the pits or groin enlarge. I continued to have a large amt.. of gas and changed bowels for about a week. I did go thru a bout with Salmonella last year, though, and i think someone told me that if you've had salmonella once, it is easy to get again. And I traced back 2 or 3 possible foods that could have provided me with that again, but not raw meat per se'. I may have gotten a bacteria in the stomach from rimming a guy the day before, too.
The slight fever subsided in 3 days or so, while the stomach and intestines took a good while to gradually get back to normal. about 2 1/2 weeks after the oral ejaculate incident, and 1 week after the initial illness, I unprotectedly ejaculated internally with my girlfriend. Now (12 to 14 days after the sex with her) she is experiencing nausea. I am very worried I may be in that small percentage of guys that contract hiv thru oral contact with semen. Here's another factor i think about:
some herbs and vitamin supplements in liquid form are designed to be taken sublingually --held under the tongue so it absorbs into the system. If this is possible, is it likely that HIV could enter the system if semen is under the tongue for
several seconds?
The other thing that got me worried about that one guy was that as I used the bathroom, I saw a tube on the countertop of a Doctor-prescribed topical ointment which turned out to be for Candidiasis (it was Nystatin Triclonolone) after I Googled it later that day. He may have been poz and just lies to get action. I know the man liked to engage in receiving anal sex, although he and I did not do that.
I want to get tested, and now it is 3 -to-4 weeks after my feared exposure, and I wan to use the Home Access kit, the antibody test. I wonder if I'd get a negative result that could turn into a positive a couple months down the road coz' I didnt wait long enough?
Sorry, so many questions. Hope some of you can help.
Thanks very much.

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Re: question for the guys new
      #90884 - 03/01/04 07:20 PM

GET TESTED. It doesn't matter if you engage in "safe" sex, if you are having sex you should get tested regularly. My partner and I have been in a monogomous relationship for eleven years. I am pos and he is neg. The only sexual act we engage in is mutual ejaculation, making sure nothing gets on him. We don't even kiss with our mouths open. It's boring, but we have managed to make it work for us. Anyway, my partner still gets tested every six months. If you are sleeping around, chances are good that you will eventually have sex with someone who is positive. They may say they aren't, they may not even know they are. You can't afford to take someone's word about being negative. You sould ALWAYS assume the other person is positive and act accordingly. And get tested regularly. You owe it to yourself and your sexual partners. Good luck!

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Re: question for the guys new
      #90896 - 03/01/04 10:41 PM

Why wouldn't you kiss with your mouths open? there have been NO documented transmissions this way!

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Re: question for the guys new
      #90969 - 03/02/04 03:21 PM

I read your post... did you know there are many std's youv'e possibly exposed yourself to? Rimming someone can expose you to herpes, anal warts, hep B and C... etc... without showing any symptoms... letting someone cum in your mouth can also expose you to gonorea, and many more pesky STD's... I suppose the woman your with does not know of your play and possible exposure your giving her? This is how these wonderful diseases are passed on and multiply over and over... did you think you may be a carrier of a STD and exposed the guy to your wonderful germs... Always assume!!! someone no matter what they may say and or even think theres a possiblity for someone having an STD... not just hiv... Having random sex... with many partners is kinda like Russian Rullet... now the only thing to do is to get checked for all sorts of pesky diseases and if by chance you possibly have several... none... or many... will you be a Man enough to take responsibility for your actions and let your sex partners know you may have exposed others to your various Germs... Thats how these wonderful STD's continue to plague us all... I wish you the best but, the only one to blame would be yourself...

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Reged: 02/14/04
Posts: 85
Loc: Arizona
Re: question for the guys new
      #91058 - 03/03/04 03:39 PM


Loosen up, I have been Pos for years, and have been with my HIV- husband for 16 years now. We have always been very open and never have we had a closed mouth kiss, unless in public. You are not going to infect your partner if you contiune to wear a condom, so loosen up and have some fun!


"Living Positive Since '83"

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Reged: 03/06/04
Posts: 2
Re: question for the guys new
      #91420 - 03/06/04 08:02 AM

While it's unlikely that you could get infected with HIV by having a guy come in your mouth, it is possible. 10-14 days after the incident is pretty fast for seroconversion to happen, though some of your symptoms do sound like it (gastrointestinal problems probably would not be related to seroconversion). If you did seroconvert, then the home test probably would be accurate, though I'd suggest testing yourself again a few more months down the road even if the first test is negative.

I think some of the other responses were pretty harsh, though generally factually correct. Rimming a guy puts you at risk for lots of nasty stuff besides HIV. You should really get a full STD panel done, and share the results of ALL of your testing (including HIV) with your girlfriend. You should get tested for STDs, including HIV, every six months until you're either monogamous or you stop having sex.

By the way, the next time a guys comes in your mouth, the safest thing to do is swallow it immediately. Transmission is more likely to happen in your mouth than in your digestive tract, so the most important thing is to get it out of your mouth as quickly as possible. You can swallow faster than you can spit.

Good luck.

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Really? new
      #95384 - 04/14/04 06:59 AM

I've never heard of swallowing instead of holding it in your mouth.

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Re: question for the guys new
      #98693 - 05/13/04 09:44 AM

My name is Achi Nadia from ivory coast in west Africa presently residing in Dakar Senegal as refugee.
My hobbies are reading,music,watching of movies and playing of basket ball.
I was impressed when i saw your profile and will like to
establishe a long lasting relation ship with you.
In addition,i will like you to reply me through my private e mail
box( ).
Thanks waiting to hear from you soonest.
MIss Achi Nadia

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