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Email Pen Pal\ Group for HIV + Gay Men
#54109 - 01/07/03 09:20 AM
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Dear readers, I am writing to you on behalf of my partner. I would like to know if anyone knows of a safe, secure and non-sexual email pen-pal\group website site where gay men with HIV\AIDS can correspondend with each other. He is basically alone all day while I'm working and is need of some day-to-day outside contact with others who share his situation. He has been positive for almost 10 years now and is often quite depressed and distraught over his life as I am as well. I do as much as I can for him but feel I am at a crossroads where I cannot provide more comfort, support and love for him without some outside help now. We only have email access at home and do not have internet access. Our email station ONLY accepts text emails. Unfortunately, it cannot accept attachments or pictures so we are limited in this area (someday we'll get a real computer!). I'd appreciate any information on his behalf.
Thank you, Scott
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Hey Scott,
I don't know of any e-mail pen/pal groups, but you might find more on Yahoo Groups. Not sure what computer you used for you post, but most libraries have computers you can use, search Yahoo for groups and post a message asking for e-mail chat and see what turns up.
I take it your not positive and doing what you can to provide support and comfort for your partner. Are there any HIV/AIDS groups in your area that offer support services? It also sounds like your partner could use some counseling. There is quite a bit, at times, that you can be depressed and distraught over in regard to HIV, but there is also life that can be lived while being HIV positive. I’ve been positive for over 4 years and doing very well.
Either one of you are more then welcome to e-mail me if you want. I check my e-mail throughout the day so will respond back as I'm able to with my work schedule.
Good Luck.
Gregg
gregg629@aol.com
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Hi Gregg, thanks for responding to my request...I appreciate it! I'll give my partner your email address and hopefully he'll send you a message or two. I have seen the Yahoo website but I'm not sure if it would support our email station it but I'll look into it. Not many people know what I'm talking about when I say we have only an email station but more advertising is being done for these neat little devices.
Anyway, you're correct in stating that I am not HIV positive myself. I've been tested more than once and am ok.
He does get regular counseling\therapy from a very sympathetic psychiatrist who also provides depression meds to him. I too, am in counseling and being treated with antidepresant meds...different counselors though.
I don't see much benefit from them though for him at this point but hopefully time will change that. For me...some benefits to them. We do have support groups for persons with HIV\AIDS our area and have gone to a meeting but he was turned off by them and felt it was not an something he wanted to pursue further. I know he has great guilt in getting HIV and has never really gotten over that but has tried.
As you know, it's difficult to get motivated when you feel like s_ _ _ all the time and he does. One of his biggest obstacles is his neuropathy. He takes meds for it and I have gotten him various things to help ease his pain....I even massage his feet nightly.
He also gets down because two friends of ours are also HIV + but are doing fantastic with minimal meds and of course wishes he was in their shoes. He's a bit of a pessimist so that doesn't help either.
Anyway, thank you again and I will give my partner your email address and offer to lend an ear. Scott
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gregg629
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Guardian
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Reged: 04/16/01
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Posts: 438
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Loc: Boston
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Hey Scott, I know all about the e-mail stations, my mom had one for a few months until I got her setup on a computer over Christmas. They are actually pretty kewl in a lot of ways.
I also can also understand your partner being tuned off by the support meetings, I have gone to a few here in Boston and have felt out of place in a few of them, but have found one that I like. I guess he just has to keep trying and talking to the centers that sponsor the meetings and try to get them to help him find what he's looking for.
I know it must be hard for him when he see's friends doing well when he's not, I have a few friends who get upset with me when I talk about how well I'm doing because they have more problems then I do, but one thing that I have found is you have to push your doctor to help you deal with the issues. Some doctors get set in doing things just one way and won't change. They put you on meds and won't consider anything else. If your having side effects you have to push your doctor to find a med combination that won't have the side effects. I know that d4t (zerit I think) has the side effect of neuropathy. That was one of the reasons why I wouldn't go on it when my doctor recommended it. I choose AZT and 3TC. AZT has it's own side effects, but I was able to deal with them easier them I was with the D4T. I have held my doctor to my belief that there should be no decrease in the quality of life just because your on meds. If your partner's doctor can't buy into that then it might be time for a new doctor.
Well Scott, I look forward to hearing from your partner, and your also more then welcome to e-mail me anytime you want.
Take Care
Gregg
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Hi Gregg, thanks for your concern and support again. I'll give my partner your email address and hopefully he'll respond to you. Just so you know, his name is David. I'll email you myself in the near future to see how you're doing as well. Have a great day, Scott
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Hello! Scotty,
Yes, indeed. I think there are a couple of us that is in search of a companion or two. I have been feeling the same to connect with someone to shoot the breeze. I would take some time ouut of my day to interact with you or your partner..I live in the New Mexico area (Albuquerque)
Drop me an e-mail..
Johnny aka Rivy
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Hey Scotty,
Wow! you just discribed my life and what I'm going through. We are so far compatable with our life situation. My partner is as well negitive thous far. I've been HIV/AIDS for 17 years and doing well so far. I just develop neropathy on both feet, the right one worst pain then the left but I'm controlling it with nerotin and it seems to help a little. I would like to e-mail your partner to say howdy. My e-mail is Rivywolf@hotmail.com
Take it easy, swell guy.
--Rivy
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Hi Rivy, thanks for responding, I appreciate it. I think it'll be good for my partner, David, to interact via email with others in his situation. I'm working all day and he is basically alone the afternoon. I'll tell him about you and see if he wants to correspond. I too will write in the future to see how you're doing. What is your email address? Thanks again, Scott
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I've got you email, I opened your later response before this one. Thank you so mucn, Scott
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Hi Rivy, Sorry to bother you but my partner David tried to email you but it was returned.Could you give me you email address again? Thanks, Scott
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Hello Scott,
Lets try another e-mail..Tell David e-mail me at
jparagon@unm.edu or try rivywolf@hotmail.com
one or the other is ok.
I hope to hear from you both soon.
---Rivy
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Hi Scotty,
You bet. I would love to interact with David. I feel, from your letter that we are going through the same life. I would love to hear more about him.
My e-mail is jparagon@unm.edu or rivywolf@hotmail.com
I will get the e-mail at either-or.
Hear from you see.
--Rivy
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Thanks Rivy, I'll give him both addresses. You'll probabaly hear from me too in the future just to say hi. Hope all is well with you.Take care, Scott
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Scotty,
You bet'cha! I would love to hear from you both.
I am doing ok..I still have the neropathy to deal with but it seems to be getting a little tolarable with the nerotin that I'm taking. It's like 900mg in the morning, 300mg in the afternoon, and then 900mg at night. My toes are still having that numb feeling, like their not there..:)But I'm getting use to it. I hope that your partner is coping.
We'll hear from you soon.
{{Hugs}}
-Rivy
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Hello,
My name is Tony, 36 and have been poz since 1985 and amstill healthy (knock knock). I would love to start a pen pal relationship with anyone that is honest aand caring. I have just moved to Charlotte NC.
Tony
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