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Sero Discordant couples
      #3261 - 04/06/00 07:37 PM

I am the HIV+ half of the couple. We haven't been together very long, but my partner has known of my HIV status since before we started dating. Everything is going great but I am hesitant about having sex. I am looking for other sero discordant couples to find out how they approach the "SEX" issue. I know that it is something we must discuss, and agree upon, but I have no idea where to draw the boundaries. Any input will be welcome. I am 24 and he is 23.

Thank you,

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Re: Sero Discordant couples new
      #3262 - 04/06/00 07:37 PM

Hi Carl: I am married to a man who is HIV positive. We have been having Protected (always with a condom) intercourse for 5 years without a problem. You can kiss and use saran wrap to give him oral sex. And you can touch all you want. Take a look at Dr. Remien's forum here
He has great advice. Also there is an article from Body Positive that I used a lot
You gotta talk about your feelings with him--it's natural to be afraid. Just don't have unprotected anal sex EVER with him.
And give your love and affection freely. Don't do what is unsafe ever.

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Re: Sero Discordant couples new
      #3263 - 04/06/00 07:38 PM

I have been in a committed relationship for over 10 years now. My partner is negative and remains so. We practice what
we feel is 'safe' for us. What I mean by that is we have talked about it and spelled out where our boundaries are in sex.
Those boundaries have moved over the years, dependent upon changes in research and my health and comfort level.
Just last night I asked my partner to have another HIV test, which he does fairly regularly, even though the chances of
infection from what we do is extremely small, I feel better when he gets his test results back and they are negative. I'd be
willing to share more intimate stuff, but not on a public bulletin board. Feel free to email me.
All the best to you! Allan

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