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New User

Reged: 10/14/09
Posts: 3
HIV Poz bttm needs sexual advice...
      #247983 - 10/14/09 10:44 AM

Hey guys, I tested poz in March 2009. Since then, I have recently gotten into a relationship. I let my partner know and he was little hestiant but became okay with it. What a relief, its seems he was a gift sent to me.

Anyway, my question is about sex.

We have had sex....protected and it has been wonderful. However, he (not me) has asked to have sex with me now unprotected. I didnt know what to think at first. I dont want to do it and he get infected, but i also heard that the chances for the top to get infected are much lower than a bottom.

Please guys...anyone, help me with some advice. I dont want some good sex to maes up my jugdgement.

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New User

Reged: 07/12/09
Posts: 6
Re: HIV Poz bttm needs sexual advice... new
      #247991 - 10/14/09 07:00 PM

it's still risky!!!!!!! so why put him on danger???
you should protect him,

best of luck

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Reged: 06/01/06
Posts: 256
Loc: Gauteng, South Africa
Re: HIV Poz bttm needs sexual advice... new
      #247998 - 10/15/09 07:25 AM

Protect the one you care about even yourself it is still a danger by putting another at risk. You are the possessor of a great power and that is the power to choose. Don't do it because they want to have unprotected sex depending on the laws he can turn around and say you infected him resulting in a lawsuit. You'll know what is the right thing to do.

"Live for today, because what you do today is what you use to make your future"

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New User

Reged: 10/27/09
Posts: 7
Loc: Ca. Alemeda county
Re: HIV Poz bttm needs sexual advice... new
      #248178 - 10/27/09 01:26 AM

i am able to give insight on a pos and neg love story, I choose to contract hiv from a man who i thought i would be spending the rest of my life with.

Forever is a long time< the only forever im left with after 9yrs. is aids. so what ever your personal decition is please look out for the unhappily ever after.

he is as regretfull as me, the difference of course is that i still have aids and am now single.

even if your lover turns pos, still hold fast to condom use, as you can re-infect your partner, limiting the cocktails, and variation of cocktails available to the both of you.

learn to love latex.

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New User

Reged: 04/20/00
Posts: 15
Loc: Dallas, TX
Re: HIV Poz bttm needs sexual advice... new
      #248208 - 10/29/09 05:34 PM

It's always going to be a personal choice. I am in a similar situation. My lover and I have been together over 10 years now, and he is still negative. We have never used protection. My viral load is undetectable and always has been, we've discussed the risks together with my HIV doctor, he has offered the SUGGESTION that with me being the bottom AND my viral load being undetectable that it does make his risk LESS, but not impossible for him to still contract it. We are mates for life, and whatever happens, we know we will deal with it together. As long as you and your partner understand all the risks involved, it comes down to your own personal choice.

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Reged: 06/26/09
Posts: 29
Loc: North Carolina
Re: HIV Poz bttm needs sexual advice... new
      #253552 - 12/15/10 07:58 AM

This is a choice that the 2 of you have to make together. Sex is about both people being comletely comfortable. If you feel uncomfortable with unprotected sex, then don't have unprotected sex. Hopefully your partner will understand that he is asking you to perform an act that is not comfortable for you.

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