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MIT
New User

Reged: 09/25/06
Posts: 11
poz - neg relationships.
      #217300 - 12/07/06 01:30 AM

thoughts?

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antibody
Member

Reged: 01/28/06
Posts: 27
Loc: san diego, california, usa
Re: poz - neg relationships. new
      #217618 - 12/08/06 05:21 PM

i am positive and my boyfriend of 3 years is negative. he is the most wonderful support. i am amazed by how much it doesn't matter to him that i am pos. i now am on treatment so hopefully the undectablilty will keep us safe from passinng the virus to him. we use safe sex of course. i am so lucky to have him and try to make sure i never take him for granted. i trully found my prince valiant.

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Anonymous
Unregistered

Re: poz - neg relationships. new
      #217708 - 12/09/06 02:18 AM

I am + and have been in a 4 year relationship with a man who is -.
My thoughts on the subject are that it is no different than any other relationship, it only has a different set of challenges - but what two relationships are alike?
Certain precautions are a must, but can if the two of you are truly in love with one another, these adjustments are no different and/or difficult than making adjustments for many other issues committed couples find necessary throughout the course of their relationship/lifetime.
Honesty, committment and fidelity are, in my opinion, key elements to any successful relationship - be it male to male, female to female or the good ole hetro-relatioship. If a couple is not committed solely to one another in every way, building the teamwork for riding the bumps that come to all of us in life, is very very difficult.
There is nothing morally right or wrong about who a person chooses to select as a partner, be it inter-racial, same-sex or with someone who has any sort of short/long term disease or illness. That is a personal choice of all free human agents.
Those are my thoughts ~ Thanks for asking and listening.

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MIT
New User

Reged: 09/25/06
Posts: 11
Re: poz - neg relationships. new
      #217752 - 12/09/06 05:49 PM

thanks you guys. as i am trying to be the most authentic person i can be i guess i shouldn't avoid a romantic relationship for fear of rejection.
i will persevere even tho i've been turned away many times.
mit

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Anonymous
Unregistered

Re: poz - neg relationships. new
      #218105 - 12/12/06 04:36 PM

Listen, man, people get turned down for all different kinds of reason every day, and our + status is just another one of those reasons, but hey, life goes on. There are so many good things about us, so much love that we can offer, care that we can provide for our potential partners that if those guys who reject us just because of our status, would probably not be the best partners in case that something else goes wrong in the future with any host of things that can go wrong (and often does in life). So, what I'm trying to say is -- keep your head up and happy dating.

Cheers!

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Since4Ever
New User

Reged: 12/17/06
Posts: 10
Loc: Shenandoah Valley, Virginia
Re: poz - neg relationships. new
      #219003 - 12/18/06 11:20 PM

I'm poz and partner of 5+years is neg. Some, let's get technical, "serodiscordant" relationships flourish and some suck. I've dated or known neg guys who might as well already be dead and poz guys that will never die, and when they get together in their various combinations, the success of the relationship will probably not depend on their statuses, but on their hearts.

I hope that made sense, because the Ambien has kicked in!

xxoo, and

--------------------
Cheers,
Since4Ever

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unite4life
New User

Reged: 01/07/07
Posts: 19
Re: poz - neg relationships. new
      #221420 - 01/11/07 11:10 AM

I agree, with anonymous also bare in mind it matters rather or not your properly educated on HIV/AIDS prevention as well as, STD.

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NAJ
New User

Reged: 07/16/09
Posts: 2
Re: poz - neg relationships. new
      #246608 - 07/19/09 03:11 AM

Hi, I was wondering, do we need to tell our potential partner from the beginning or just wait and we'll see how things go. I've been diagnosed positive a year ago and since then had not the courage to have a relationship although there is an attraction to someone. but i always try to block him or to give him the feel there is nothing serious between us not to be obliged to open up to him. please advice

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Jackie__Blue
Veteran

Reged: 01/20/07
Posts: 1186
Re: poz - neg relationships. new
      #246609 - 07/19/09 07:45 AM

I think it's best to disclose early and get it out of the way.

It's good for you because it gets the topic out in the open early. Some people just can't handle someone with HIV and if that's the case, then better to know that before you get very deep into a relationship. Also by disclosing early you remove the stress from yourself because you know it's something you will have to do.

It's good for the relationship because no relationship can be built upon secrets and your HIV status would be a big one.

It's good for the other person. Everyone should have the right to decide for themselves. By not disclosing you are taking away that right.

If you read through these boards you will find that many people are in solid relationships where one person is neg and the other poz. It happens so don't count yourself out.

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dadsboy
New User

Reged: 07/14/09
Posts: 4
Loc: South Africa, Western Cape, Cape Town
Re: poz - neg relationships. new
      #246801 - 07/31/09 07:48 AM

I could not agree more with you! I am HIV - and my boyfriend is HIV + and we have a good relationship! It is difficult if you do not trust somebody - various reasons - like porn and other stuff. It is so important to have honesty and openess in your relationship and not an open relationship! What is the point?

--------------------
The the Angels be your Light and Guide!

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dadsboy
New User

Reged: 07/14/09
Posts: 4
Loc: South Africa, Western Cape, Cape Town
Re: poz - neg relationships. new
      #246802 - 07/31/09 07:52 AM

The feel free to love and be loved! Why would you deny yourself one of the most basic needs - the need to love and to be loved!

I am HIV negative and I have been turned away and I still fear that - even in my current relationship!

Good luck! Hope, love and white light!



--------------------
The the Angels be your Light and Guide!

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