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Rick64
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Newbie
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Reged: 08/25/06
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Posts: 2
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Loc: North of Toronto
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Lookin' for some other guys living with AIDS
#204951 - 08/25/06 05:58 PM
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Hi, I'm 42 and share my life with a negative man for five years now. I was diagnosed with PCP/AIDS and a bunch of other small joys shortly after my first partner of 6 years passed away. My new partner and I now travel between our homes in a small town 2 hours north of Toronto and Maryland. I'm just tryin to find some friends for mutual support... okay, right now I need the support..............
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Bear60
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Legend
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Reged: 12/21/05
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Posts: 1390
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Hi Rick
Welcome. Here we are. Whats up with you?
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6 ft tall poz bear in Philadelphia
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Rick64
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Newbie
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Reged: 08/25/06
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Posts: 2
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Loc: North of Toronto
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My name is Rick. Forty-two years old and diagnosed in 02-01, with AIDS, PCP, wasting syndrome, and a few other little things. My first husband died from AIDS three months before I was diagnosed. I was lucky to find another man that loves me and that I love, and we have been together for nearly five years. He is HIV-. I don't know where to start talking about what's bothering me. Recently I feel as though there is a hurricane in my head spinning out of control. Sometimes there are just too many things to do... too many decisions to be made... and I'm just really feeling tired. Not so much physically tired, even though I'm anemic, I've become used to that tired and work around it. This is mentally tired I think.. like I wish I had a switch that I could just turn off for a bit. My partner and I are about to leave our house here in Canada to head to our house in Maryland on my families farm........just writing that gives me a headache. Sometimes I feel like I want to run away and just pretend like I don't have AIDS and let what happens , happen. Then, I reallize how ridiculous that is.
How do you get away from yourself?
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Bear60
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Legend
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Reged: 12/21/05
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Posts: 1390
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Hi Rick....I sent you a Private message. But let me say that your depression sounds like its getting the best of you and you probably need to discuss this with your doctor. We all have had to deal with some form of depression so I know where of I speak.
Good luck and keep well!! You have a lot to live for and a wonderful life, it sounds to me.
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6 ft tall poz bear in Philadelphia
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FredCba
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Reged: 08/28/06
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Posts: 10
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I know it's hard and whatever we say will be useful only if you're ready to listen. I'm also living with an HIV- man who has accepted me for who I am and loves me beyond HIV. We have a wonderful life together, both in and out of bed, and living with HIV has become something like having to brush my teeth every day. I understand you because I tend to get these hurricanes in my mind from time to time. But one thing I think I've learned to understand: it's better to slow the mind down by thinking about the wonderful things life still has to offer us; not huge and fantastic miracles of technology or sophisticated activities: just being alive with someone who loves us on our side. Hope you'll get better.
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Survivor
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Legend
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Reged: 10/30/05
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Posts: 3256
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Loc: Get off the fence and live again!
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Depression is treatable.. Talk to your HIV Doc about it soon... You have nothing to loose except time with him..
Love
Eric
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Cyrus
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Member
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Reged: 03/17/06
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Posts: 15
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Welcome to the board Bro!...... How are you? Send me a private message, Im certainly happy to hear fro you soon. Take care.
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