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The Greatest of these is LOVE...
Apr 7, 1999

I met warm, funny, caring man last summer. He has been HIV positive for 13 years aquired through IV drug use prior to diagnosis which was after he changed his life around for the better.This man is so special and he has faced so many challengesliving with AIDS for 3 years now. Hes responded well to therapies, VL undetectable and T-cells holding out at a OI avoidant level. He adheres to his meds and has really fought this battle with great faith and spiritualness intact. We often talk about God and faith and love and are thankful we have one another. I love this man. He loves me, although hes afraid of ever hurting me physically or emotionally.The problem with him is that he is very depressed. This time its not going. Although meds keep his labs good, hes tired and depressed and has lost his "edge" in the fight. He says he doesnt care if he wakes up anymore.His sisters died young, one due to suicide. He says he'd never consider that and has promised his mother hed outlive her so she wouldnt lose another child. I want to help him. Where can we get help?Please pray for us. He is begging for help now. The last time he was depressed the counseling place told him to wait a month for an appt. THATS CRAZY! He went and told his doc how bad it is but havent heard what happened. What can you possibly tell someone who has struggled and have lost their faith, hope and desire to go on? He's not suffering any illness at this time, although CMV blinded him in 1 eye a few years ago.

Sorry so long, a lot to cover. If love is the greatest gift..why can't my love help him?

Response from Father DeMartini

Dear friend, First of all, I want to assure you and you and your dear friend are very much in my prayers. I also want to encourage you in your deep love to be as clear and honest as you can with your friend. Let him know how scared and powerless you feel--he knows those feelings too and you can understand and support each other in very powerful and intimate ways. I also would hope that your friend has access to other people who are struggling long term with meds and other issues--I think that peer support and understanding can be helpful. What can you do?---keep affiriming and loving your friend to the best of your ability and also remember to affirm and love yourself. Be sure you are honestly speaking your feelings with him and, together, letting others care for you. I pray that God will bless your love, support and struggles. Please stay in touch, Fr. Rod



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