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For "Trapped"
Mar 12, 1997

Could you pass this on to the young man who wrote you the message published under the title "Trapped In A Destructive Relationship"? In addition to the good advice Rev. Pieters gave you, you should realize that this older man's threat to "tell your parents," or tell anybody who is not part of his sex circle, is almost certainly a bluff. You would risk having to deal with rejection by your parents (which might or not happen, and which is a prospect you're going to have to deal with some day anyway). He would risk a long, long stay in prison -- where people "sent up" for child molestation are reportedly not especially popular. (Even if he avoided prison, enormous damage to his job or career could easily occur.) Unless this man is unbelievably stupid or so insanely fixated on controlling you that he is willing to take this fearful risk (in which case you may be in danger of physical harm anyway), he is going to let the matter drop as quietly as possible, once he concludes that you are no longer being intimidated by this threat. I would also urge you to get in touch with the gay student group at your university or, if there is none, a gay youth group in your city or the nearest metropolitan center. If you can make any friends there whom you feel you can trust, they will probably be happy to help and may be able to put you in contact with specific sources of assistance.

Response from Rev. Pieters

Thanks for your additional advice. Readers might be interested to know that "Trapped" wrote us back at The Body, saying that he was successfully resolving the situation!

Struggle and spiritual pain
Trapped in a Destructive Relationship

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