Dear Reverend:

I know I'm sick, but outwardly I don't show any signs. I'm lucky

My mother doesn't say much although I can see in her eyes her worry.

What is your best advice to reassure her that I'm going to be okay

no matter what happens. She's 67 years old and all of a sudden she's

beginning to show the signs of age to me. I hate this. I'm afraid of

losing her and she's afraid of losing me. I could not live with AIDS

without her comfort.

Yes, you are lucky... you live at a time when HIV can, in many cases, be treated successfully. Thus, you can live for many year without "showing any signs." But by the title of your question, it sounds as if your mother still worries. Of course she does... she's your mother! Anything that threatens the life of her child is going to be a serious concern.

While it's important to allow her feelings, you can also give her a great deal of reassurance by giving her the facts of life with HIV: how treatments today are helping people live longer; how even before the treatments, there were a number of people who lived with HIV without symptoms for years. Give her hope. Let her see how healthy you are! Perhaps you can introduce her to other persons with HIV who are doing well, and see that it is possible to be fully alive with HIV.