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Not Knowing What to Believe In Anymore
Sep 12, 1997

At the age of 31, I can honestly say that I do not know what I believe in anymore. I was raised Catholic. Although I do not practice since there are many teachings that I do not agree with. Over the years I have tried different faiths to try & see what works best for me. At this time, I have not found one. Nothing I have attended has really "touched" me. Is there something other than us to believe in? I am lost... have been for a very long time. The words in Our Father send chills up my spine & tears from my eyes... I DON'T UNDERSTAND. I'm so very lost....

Response from Rev. Pieters

"Church shopping" can be a hard job. But I would urge you to keep looking. Have you tried a Metropolitan Community Church (MCC)? Many people, both straight and gay, have found a spiritual home here. Many of the members of MCC have had the same kind of disillusionment you have suffered with the faith of their childhood.

Some people never do find a comfortable church home. Perhaps this is because they are expecting too much. The great German theologian, Dietrick Bonhoeffer, wrote in his book "Life Together," that it is only when our "wish dream" of how church should be is shattered that we can really begin to appreciate the true grace of any community of faith.

Are you expecting too much? Are your expectations realistic? Many people never find a life partner because everyone they meet fails the test they've set up. Likewise, you may never find a comfortable church home if your expectations are out of tune with reality. Your capacity to forgive the church community for not being everything you expect is going to be very important to your finding that spiritual home that touches you the way you want.

You say you don't know what to believe anymore. Put your faith in God, and not in a particular church body. They are different, you know! If you succeed in doing this, you might be surprised how God leads you to just the right community of faith. So keep shopping! And God bless you on your journey.

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