Dear Rev. Pieters, A friend of mine has been HIV+ for fourteen years and recently underwent though is recovering from, a serious bout of pneumonia. He is a devout Christian. I am a believing, but struggling, Catholic. At times I find it difficult to discuss religion with him, which I feel terrible about because it's so crucially important to us both. The crux of the problem lies not so much in the fact that I'm Catholic and he's Protestant, but in that one of the things he's mentioned recently is that he believes in a rapidly approaching Revelations-described Armageddon. I think this has to do with him confronting his own mortality. He's reading Revelations really closely, also a book by John Hagee called "The Last Days," or something like that, and he seems to be becoming convinced that Earth is in its final phase. I find this particular belief of his very disquieting. I feel personally frightened by it, and I also suspect that this belief of his is interfering with his willingness to accept medical treatment. Throughout the fourteen years of him being Hiv+, my friend has never undergone any anti-viral treatment. I keep trying (gently) to convince him to try a protease-inhibitor cocktail now. He doesn't seem to be focusing on the medical aspects of his condition. I printed out your answer to "Faith vs. Medication" for him, and I hope it will help. Sorry this is so long-winded. My question to you is, how can I talk to him about faith without feeling so overwhelmed and alienated by some of his beliefs? He really needs support on this issue, and I pray for him, but I just don't understand or accept parts of his fundamentalism and that pains me. Thanks and God Bless.

Yes, it can be very difficult to deal with someone who is apparently quite rigid in his beliefs. And fundamentalists can be very rigid about their beliefs. There are some who feel that this kind of religious rigidity comes from a deep-seated insecurity, and a profound need for concrete answers to what many feel are unanswerable questions. The rigidity of fundamentalism can be very attractive to people who feel vulnerable or cast adrift in life, which can certainly be a reaction to an HIV diagnosis.

Similarly, apocalyptic thinking (that the world is coming to an end) can come from great discomfort or dissatisfaction with this life. It's complicated these days by the approaching new millennium. Every time there is a significant landmark in our calendars, like a new century or millennium, there are always people who begin proclaiming the end of the world. The truth is no one knows when or if the end of the world will happen, just as none of us know exactly when we're going to die. But people will begin to claim it is coming soon, often as a way of escaping the realities and challenges of the present day, rather than as a way of addressing these challenges with integrity.

Jesus speaks of the end of the world, but often in the context of encouraging his followers to change their lives for the better, not as some form of escapism. It served as motivation to do all they could to lead a holy life now. In the years immediately after Jesus' death, resurrection, and ascension, some of the earliest Christians believed that the end of the world with the Second Coming of Christ was immediately imminent. This had a direct influence on how they lived their lives. But as the first generation of Christians began to die off before Jesus came again, later generations had to adjust their beliefs and their understanding of apocalyptic thinking. That is what we've inherited through 20 centuries.

From what you've written, it seems your friend desperately needs security in his life, and is finding it through fundamentalism. Can you provide him with the security of knowing he has a true friend? Can you help him see other ways in which he can feel secure and safe?

Episcopal Bishop John Spong wrote a great book called, "Rescuing the Bible from Fundamentalism." This might be a very good resource for you in dealing with your friend. But ultimately, he is free to believe as he wishes, just as you are. If you have done everything you can to help him see that these beliefs are not helping him towards health and wholeness, you may have to face accepting him as he is. Actually, that may be exactly the gift he needs to help him realize he has the power to help himself.