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Apr 10, 2014

Hello, my boyfriend tested positive after we had sex without a condom once a night before. he and i were very stressed that day after we both received the results. he was put on drugs (Ceptrine) on the 4th of FEB 2014 while i was put on PEP.Since then life has changed for the both of us. we have have sex with a condom but he says he can't feel a thing at all and he says he can't go on that way as he rather die than suffer. he likes to lick my virginal but i can't let him as am afraid i may contract the virus and i can't suck his penis too ( Do you think i can acquire the virus through him licking and i sucking) . he also wants to have a baby with me but since we can't have live sex then i guess it will be difficult. i love him so much and he loves me to . Is there any medication that can be used so that i remain negative with out the use of condoms?.Thanking you in advance for your advise

Response from Ms. Southall

Hi I'm sorry that you are having to go through this. But please know that there is life after diagnosis. There are ways for the two of you to be together and done so safely. The risk of HIV transmission with oral sex is extremely low. It is even reasonable to state that for the person receiving oral sex (that is on whom oral sex is being performed) the risk of acquisition of the virus is practically zero. For the person placing his or her mouth on someone else's genitals, the risk may be slightly higher but still very very low. Theoretically, obvious cuts, wounds, sores, or infections in the mouth could raise this risk. But relatively speaking this is still considered to be a low-risk sexual activity as the mouth is not a hospitable place for the HIV virus. As long as your partner is on meds and has a viral load that is undetectable the risk of HIV transmission dramatically decreases. It is harder for women to transmit to men than men to women. This being said as your partner is getting on treatment and continues in care, wearing condoms is of upmost importance and being safe. Placing you on medications, such as Truvada is a good treatment option to prevent HIV transmission.

Continue getting yourself and your partner educated is hugely important. My husband is negative and I'm positive and we have a great life which includes a healthy sex life.

Be well and stay safe, Shannon

can you help me please?

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