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Can someone answer my question? :-(

Jan 24, 2014

Hello... First I want to say that your website has been very informative and has helped me understand a lot more about the HIV virus & how it can be spread. Ive been reading different stories/answers for the past few weeks and they all have taught me something new. Im having a situation that Im hoping someone can help me understand better. For the past year, Ive been dating someone who is HIV positive. I wasnt aware he was at first, but after the 2nd month of us being together he told me his status. Although Im negative, I care a lot for him & decided to stay involved with him. We havent been sexually active, but the past few months we've engaged in kissings( both close mouth & french), some dry humping w/o clothes and he's fingered & performed oral(anilingus) on me. There hasnt been any intercouse or ejaculation on his end though. My fear is that Ive contracted the virus. Im really freaking out b/c the last time he went down on me was a few days ago & my anus is kinda sore. Can someone plz let me if this sounds like Ive contracted HIV? And what steps should I take to remain negative if I want to continue my relationship...

Response from Mr. Cordova

Hi there,

Thanks for writing in.

From what you have described, it does not sound like you have put yourself at risk for HIV. The best defense against staying HIV negative is using a condom for each and every act of anal sex. If you like, you could use a condom for oral sex, but the risk is low, and I do not think it is necessary. When possible, both parties should avoid brushing or flossing two hours prior to oral sex. This will help reduce the likelihood of bleeding gums.

I would also suggest an HIV test every three months. It will help put your mind at ease.

Thank you for being open to dating someone who is HIV positive. Not everyone is as open and understanding as you are.

In health,


Hiv - Is there any possibility here?
STD from mutual masturbation

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