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How can I be negative and my partner positive

Oct 12, 2013

I am 40 years old. I have had UNprotected sex with at least 1000 guys. I am versatile, but 90% top. I have been in a relationship for the past 10 years. My partner is Asian & I am white.

My partner has had very few sexual encounters before me. He never had unprotected sex before meeting me. We live together and work together, so we are together 99% of the time, so I know he has never cheated.

Having turned 40, I figured we should go get tested for HIV. I tested negative. (Blood test) The doctor retested me at my request, and the second test was also negative.

My partner tested positive.

We have had sex 3 to 4 times per week for 10 years, so at least 2000 times. We never used protection.

How can this be possible.

Response from Dr. Wohl

The question is whether your partner has ever had an HIV test before and if so, when? If he never had a test, than it is possible he was infected prior to meeting you, assuming he has been faithful.

If he has a negative test in the recent past, then he acquired the virus subsequently, and, I am sorry to say, not from a toilet seat.

As to why are you not infected: this demonstrates that this is generally not the easiest virus to catch (HBV and HCV are much more contagious). A low viral load in your partner, a genetic resistance to infection in you, luck, can all be at work here.

Obviously, important to use condoms from here on in and to get HIV tested again 12 weeks since your last unprotected encounter with your partner.


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