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im positive shes not

Oct 28, 2012

I've been positive for only 6 months, but since finding out my wife and i have not had any type of sexual contact. I understand any time my penis is involved protection is a must but is it safe for her to receive oral sex from me without risks of infection. as well we still want a child together is that now an impossible idea because neither of us would want to take the chance of infecting our child

Response from Ms. Southall

Hi Sorry to hear about your recent diagnosis. This is a tough time for you. There are many studies out there that document the evidence that having an undetectable viral load can decrease the risk of transmission by up to 96% and of course using a condom decreases the risk even more so. As for oral sex, this carries the lowest risk of HIV transmission. As long as neither of you have sores on the areas involved the risk is very minimal. As for having children, this is very possible. There are a few things to look into. One is sperm washing where they would take your sperm and wash it and then inseminate your wife. There are also individuals who have chosen to use unprotected sex when either partner has an undetectable viral load and this can reduce the risk. There is also a new drug being used for prevention of HIV transmission, Truvada. All of these items you should have a conversation with both your infectious disease specialist and a OBGYN who specializes in care of HIV and transmission.

Be well and take things one day at a time, it does get better!


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