my bf is positive and takes his meds regularly. me and him havnt had sex yet and i was wondering if we should use a condom or not since the meds keep it in check or should we us condoms he doesnt really like using them cuz it doesnt feel right to him and i use them but i feel the same about them. i know this question sound kind of stupid and bad but i wanted to ask and get a professional's opinion. my uncle passed away of hiv a month after i was born and he was gay and im gay as well. it worries me a lil.

Hi, there:

I am sorry to hear about your uncle. While HAART significantly reduces the likelihood of infection, it does not eliminate it. Using a condom during each and every act of penetrative sex is the best way to prevent the spread of HIV and many STD's.

The best case scenario is that you and your partner would use condoms for each and every act of penetrative sex. If that is not possible, I would suggest that when you are the receptive (bottom) partner, you use a condom, as the risk of transmission is higher. If that is not possible, then don't let your partner ejaculate inside of you as this increases the risk as well.

I would suggest talking with your boyfriend and determining what risks each of you are willing to take. Is he willing to risk infecting you? Are you willing to be infected by the person who says they care about you? These are things to think about. I hope this helps.

In health,

Richard