(irrational) Fear of transmission?
Jun 3, 2012
Hello, after an experience a two and a half weeks ago I have been fearful of contracting HIV - it's beginning to affect my general mental wellbeing and causing a lot of anxiety.
I have a regular partner but stupidly met up with someone else. We engaged in brief mutual masterbation - this has sinced caused me worry as I have eczema on my hands, although skin in tact and nothing is bleeding.
He eventually ejaculated on to me, onto my clothing. I had ejaculated but within the shorts I was wearing. As I took my clothes off to get cleaned up, I'm pretty sure I didn't get any fluids on my hands or any fluids that weren't mine near my penis. But the more you think about it, the more your mind goes crazy and thinks 'what if...'
Since then every little change I see in myself I'm attributing to HIV acute infection. Approx 2 weeks after the experience, I had a 'slight' sore throat, and felt generally rubbish throughout the day, I have also taken to compusively checking my chest for a rash. I have had one or two small spots/raised bump type areas on my chest but I'm not sure if this is just folicitis or something else. An area of my chest does also seem slightly blotchy but not a deep red/purple colour at all.
The mental anguish of thinking that I could also potentially give this to my regiular partner is also contributing to a large part of my stress, as well as not being able to take a test that will be able to accurately give a result, for another week and a half (4 week mark, a 'dual' blood test).
My rational mind tells me that, based on the encounter, it's a very low risk activity. But the chance could be there from some remote reason? Thanks for any words that you can offer to put my mind at ease for now.
Response from Ms. Southall
Hi Your rational mind is correct! You cannot get HIV from mutual masturbation. Of course getting tested is the one true way to know your status. This sounds like it would calm your nerves and bring down your anxiety as well.
Be well and get tested! Shannon
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