Dear doctor, I may sound paranoid, but I thought it would be better to ask and expert than to come up with assumptions and conclusions on my own. I'm a gay guy. A couple of days ago, I met a guy whom I went out with and things got physical as the evening came to an end. I haven't had anal with anyone yet so far ( just fingering ). However, with this guy, he did some fingering and frottage ( rubbing his penis on my anus, without protection ) action. We were about to do it when he pulled out this ( probably expired ) condom and didnt have any lube ( he wanted to use hair gel as a substitute ) and thats when I backed out. Now, what i'm scared about is that this guy obviously isnt very careful and particular when it comes to safety, even though he is pretty hygienic. However, what im scared of is that he had used his finger and spit to finger me, and right after that he rubbed his penis around my anus that had been stretched a little from his finger. He didnt ejaculate and after we stopped, I asked if he had been tested before, to which he said yes, but got a little annoyed over that question. Do i have anything to worry about ? Your advice is greatly appreciated Thanks. S

Hi From what you have described your risk of HIV transmission is very small. Also I wouldn't make assumptions, you didn't see the condom expiration date and at least he had a condom. Saliva doesn't contain HIV. There has to be a direct exchange of body fluid and though there may have been some pre cum you would have to have some cuts or openings in your anal area. so again, the risk is low but there was a risk. Also I would suggest being prepared yourself next time and having condoms with you that you know are good and so you are a little more in control of your situation.

Be well and stay safe, Shannon