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Apr 18, 2012

My boyfriend of several years has had repeated sex with another woman who is HIV positive and bordering on AIDS. He never informed me prior to having sex with me that he has been sleeping with her. Is it possible for him to still get a negative test result and still transmit this disease to me through regular sexual intercourse? He has told me he has tested negative but I don't believe him. I think he IS positive and trying to hide it from me for fear of what may happen to him. As I said, he never informed me prior to having sex with him after he started this affair with this HIV positive woman. My question is: can he transmit it to me? Will he eventually test positive if he hasn't already? I have had 3 negatives so far but I am worried I may test positive in the future. I appreciate any and all responses.

Response from Ms. Southall

Hi I'm sorry that you are in this situation. First, not everytime someone has sex with an individual who has HIV can the virus be transmitted. Just like trying to get pregnant it doesn't always happen with the first attempt! Secondly, not knowing her health status, but if she is on medication for her HIV we know that this dramatically reduces the chances of HIV transmission occurring. Third, when you get tested, the first time at 3 weeks from the exposure then at 3 months, if no other exposure between the 3 week and the 3 month time frame occurs than you are HIV negative. To be absolutely sure you can have a test at 6 months. If this is negative then you are negative from the exposure that happen 6 months prior. Once there is another exposure then the time frame starts over again. There is a window period that occurs from time of infection to the time that a test would be positive. During this time the individual is able to transmit the virus. So though he has tested negative doesn't always mean that he is. I would recommend a course of action on your part, first it doesn't sound like a mentally healthy relationship to be in and I would consider that. Next, if you do chose to stay with him insist on using condoms as this does prevent HIV from being transmitted and last but certainly not least, insist on him being tested again. You both need to know for sure your status's.

Hope this helps, Be well and stay safe, Shannon

used condom wrong way around and half way down
wound due to sharp hair of another person

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