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Two nice gay guys, question 2

Sep 11, 2011

First, thank you for your reply to us a few days ago. I emailed you a quick follow-up question from my cellphone because one part of your answer confused me a little and I just wanted to be clear. But, alas, you deserve a much better question that the one I tried to thumb-out on my phone, so here goes.

The only sexual things either one of us have done in the past (no lie) is mutual masturbation. I did oral on one guy many years ago (once) and have been tested multiple times since for HIV antibodies (always negative). We haven't had any relations of any kind with anyone else for the past 15 weeks and, at 12+ weeks, we both tested negative. We only want to do mutual masturbation together, and MAYBE a little oral with no ejaculation. Why? It's fine with us. We aren't into anything beyond that.

You replied that we could do masturbation (no risk). But you also added that if we were paranoid somewhat (we are) we could get tested again at 6 months and use condoms until that time.

So, the questions that popped up in my mind: 1) If we're only doing mutual masturbation, do we need condoms for that (is that what you were referring to?) 2) If we both had negative HIV antibody tests at 12+ weeks, and the only thing we've both done in the past was mutual masturbation (and the one time oral thing that I did a long time ago), wouldn't this test be enough? 3) Did you mean to use condoms for oral (or were you assuming we might have anal sex - which we have never done in the past with anyone, and don't have any desire to do together). 4) Just a FYI, I also had a DNA HIV test 6 weeks into the relationship (7 weeks after I masturbated one guy who was a little promiscuous) in addition to the antibody test at 12 weeks. Wouldn't that negative result provide add to the fact that we're both HIV negative now?

I just am unsure whether we want to remain paranoid (read that as worred) until 6 months if our only past risks were mutual masturbation with previous partners (and we were both VERY honest about that).

I'm sorry for pressing you for another opinion, but it would be helpful if you have time to reply to us. Do you accept flowers?

Response from Dr. Frascino

Hey, Guys.

Welcome back to the forum. Are you guys sure you're gay? Your past sexual histories are, um, somewhat uncommon. I'm glad you two found each other!

Responding to your specific questions:

1. Nope.

2. Yep.

3. I recommended condoms as an extra layer of protection (so to speak), if either one of you was at all concerned about your or your partner's status or if you just wanted to be extra safe to protect against one or the other of you perhaps having an extracurricular sexperience with the pool boy or pizza delivery guy, etc.

4. Yep!

As for flowers, who could possibly turn them down? However, another option would be to donate the funds to my foundation, The Robert James Frascino AIDS Foundation ( That way it's a gift that keeps on giving.

Be well. Stay well, guys. I'm sure you will!

Dr. Bob

Two nice gay men want sex without condoms Sep 3, 2011

Had unprotected sex once with an HIV+ woman
Please Help Me Doc! Donating $500 Today!!

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