Accidentally magnetic couple, what now?
Sep 9, 2011
Hi Doc -
Thanks, first of all, for taking the time to answer all of our questions.
My situation is this: I am a bi-sexual male. I test regularly for STDs (about every 6 months). I have had 3 partners in the past year --- one 12 months ago, one ~6 and one current. I was last tested 6 months ago, before meeting my previous pseudo bf.
I never engaged in sex (oral or otherwise) with my 6-month-old bf. Call me old-fashioned, but I typically move slowly. We engaged in mutual masturbation, and some kissing.
I do, however, have sex with my current girlfriend. Since I was under the impression I had not put myself at risk in the past year for an STD, and since she was just tested for everything - we engage in unprotected sex.
Here's the rub: My pseudo ex-bf just told me he is poz. He does not know from when.
I need your advice on what to do. My understanding is that the activities I engaged in with him were zero risk, which is why I have sex with my gf; however, I am still concerned for her health.
If I tell her unnecessarily that my ex has HIV, she will freak out because she is a certified hypochondriac. Further, it would be odd if we stopped having sex.
What should I do?
For a little help or reassurance, I will donate $20 to the cause (I'm a poor student).
Response from Dr. Frascino
My, your life is certainly complicated. You're a "bi-sexual male" with a "previous pseudo ex-boyfriend" (whatever that is) who recently discovered he is positively charged and you have unprotected sex with your current certified hypochondriacal girlfriend. However you mention you never engaged in sex with your "6-month-old boyfriend." (WHAT? Your boyfriend is only six-months-old. Talk about a cradle robber. Jeeeeez.)
Okay, here's the scoop. Mutual masturbation and kissing are not considered a risk for HIV transmission/acquisition. Even though your certified hypochondriacal girlfriend tested negative "for everything" some time ago, I would still advise you use latex condoms for penetrative sex to avoid unwanted pregnancy and just as an extra layer of protection (so to speak) in case she, too, has a secret life of previous pseudo ex-lover hanky-panky.
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