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please help :( can't take this anymore

Jul 12, 2011


my risk was unprotected oral (MSM) me giving without ejaculation for no longer than a minute in total

what is my risk of getting hiv? i have been told so many times that i am just worrying for no reason, and 5 professionals (3gp's and 2 sexual health advisors) said i didn't really need to test in the first place.

took a 3 week 4th gen test post exposure that was negative and was told i can take this as conclusive... but i am still displaying certain 'symptoms' such as a itchy dry cough, not painful, and not too frequent, petechiae on my arms... and it might just be my eyes but i am dreading hairy leukoplakia on my tongue sides. (I think there's something there but there might not be, might be my mind)

i cant take this anymore.. i haven't been myself for a month and a bit (the time since exposure)

i don't know whether to test again or not at 3 months, and i can't handle this anxiety. i don't know what to do. The guy who i engaged with i know very well, but only because of other connections, so i don't nessecarily know what he gets up to. he says he's been with one other guy about 3 years ago, and that was only oral sex. he's bicurious like me and i know for a fact he's had female sexual partners. his history is a bit shady and i know he has behavioural issues.

please help :(

Response from Dr. Frascino


I tend to agree with what you've been told by the "5 professionals"! Your HIV-acquisition risk is remote at best. Your symptoms are not consistent with HIV acute retroviral syndrome. If you need the reassurance of a definitively negative HIV test, you'll need to wait until the three month mark.

Your irrational obsession with HIV is most likely due to your reluctance to address more complex issues, such as your sexual orientation. Counseling with a licensed mental health professional to explore sexual orientation issues as well as your irrational fears of HIV/AIDS is warranted.

Good luck.

Dr. Bob

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