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Sorry to ask again but please i need help
Jul 11, 2011

dear Dr.Rob please answer me, pleeeeeese, This is the second Question in 24hrs, and i am in great anxiety.

i had sex 5 weeks ago with a sex worker, prior to the sex act i was inserting a sex toy in the anus i had few spot of blood coming out, i washed it up , soon after that he arrived and we started, he inserted his finger, and then we exchanged oral sex, after that he placed a condom and he was top, the sexual intercourse lasted for 5 minutes, he didn't ejaculate, after he left i checked the condom, it was intact no holes, and i freaked out so i showered him with questions about his HIV status, until he told me he is negative and he get tested every 15 days, i tried again after 3 weeks and he had the same answer. after 4 weeks of that incident i had some sore throat, no fever no enlarged lymph nodes...etc. if we suppose that he didn't tell the truth and he is actually HIV positive, what is the likelihood of me getting infected. And the most important Q ,i love my wife and this is one last mistake,i wanna know if i should have unprotected sex with her before completing the 3 month window period, or should i use a condom,which mean telling her why and ruining my life, i might be afraid of getting the disease but my greatest fear is to give it to her. one last thing, where is the donation Link i dont seem to find it sir, you are providing a great help, really great.

Response from Dr. Frascino

Hi.

Your HIV-acquisition risk is very low. Condom-protected anal sex would not be an HIV risk, assuming the latex condom was used properly and did not fail (break). Unprotected oral sex carries only a very low risk for HIV transmission/acquisition.

Even though your HIV risk is very low, I would still advise that you level with your wife. It's not only the best way to confront your guilt; it's also the right thing to do. You can then decide together whether or not to use condoms until your three-month HIV-antibody test.

You might also consider talking with a counselor about sexual orientation issues. I don't doubt you love your wife, but that won't change your sexual orientation. It's important to be honest with yourself as well as with your wife.

Donation information for The Robert James Frascino AIDS Foundation can be found on the foundation's Web site at www.concertedeffort.org. Thanks for your support.

Good luck. Be well.

Dr. Bob



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