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Help! One Bad Mistake. Will donate 50 dollars for help!

Mar 26, 2011

Dr. Bob,

I really need your help. I made a huge mistake and will gladly give your foundation a donation for your help and advice.

Me and my wife have had serious marriage problems do to not having children. Sex became frustrating for her because it never yielded children thus our sex life totally dries up at times.

After years and months of long periods of no sex and never knowing when or if it will happen i broke under temptation and went to an Asian Massage parlor. I was just planing a little release and physical contact. The Korean lady that saw me agreed to give me covered oral and let me finger her. But because of her lack of english she thought i wanted covered oral and full intercourse. So while she was up on the table doing oral she just slid right down on my penis without warning and started doing sexual intercourse. It honestly was not planned but felt to good, and the girl was of eager, and pretty, i am ashamed that i could not stop it.

In the end the exposure i had was she put the condom in with her mouth, and she licked/sucked my scrotum (briefly), i sucked her breasts, and we had full vigorous sex with a condem that i assume was latex. other than putting it on with her mouth she seemed really careful and every time we changed postions she doubled checked with her hand to ensure the condem was still on and not failing. At the end she cleaned me up and wiped me clean with a damp cloth and i with what i think was an alcohol based hand germ wash.

Part of my concern is the condem was on well and cover 3/4's of my penis but i was very aroused and erect so the bottom part of my shaft may not have been fully covered and i was trusting her very deeply. About and hour later, feeling so confused and aroused still, i masturbated without thinking, before be able to shower. So my concern is that maybe some her fluids got rubbed into my penis hole.

It has been about a week and i have felt tired, weak, and had some stomach issues, but that could be guilt and stress. I have no idea if this girl was HIV positive or not, but she was the sole worker at her parlor so i am assumes she has sex with many men a day since the parlar gets many reviews. Maybe, i am being stupid since i used a condom and there was no failure. But i am scared and want to know if i really need testings. What are the odds doc?

Again i will donate 50 bucks. Thank you so much for your help.

Sincerely, ramicure"Guilty and never doing it again".

Response from Dr. Frascino

Hello "Guilty and Never Doing It Again,"

I see no cause for concern.

Protected sex is indeed "protected," assuming the latex condom was used properly and didn't break, which appears to be the case here. HIV cannot permeate intact latex. No way. No how. Your fears about masturbating an hour after protected sex and transferring vaginal fluids from the base of your penis to your urethra are unwarranted. HIV doesn't live very long outside the body. Plus, your chance of transferring an adequate amount of infected fluids into your urethra in this manner is essentially nonexistent.

I agree your symptoms are related to guilt and stress.

The main reason to consider testing would be for psychological peace of mind. I'm quite confident you would test negative.

I would recommend you level with your wife, as it's not only the best way to confront your guilt; it's also the right thing to do. If she is concerned about your status, you could use latex condoms with her until you reconfirm your HIV-negative status with a definitive HIV-antibody test at the three-month mark.

Thank you for your support of The Robert James Frascino AIDS Foundation ( It's very warmly appreciated. In return I'm sending you my good-luck/good-health karma that you are now and will forever be HIV free.

Good luck.

Dr. Bob

Unprotected intercourse with multiple 'high-risk' partners in the Philippines and Thailand...
PEP regimen to prevent superinfection or Hep C after condom failure

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