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Recieved oral sex from risky partner

Mar 16, 2011

Hi Dr. Bob,

This will be my first time posting. I have been combing this site for the past 4 months or so due to an HIV scare. I know that my question will be very similar to many other concerned viewers, but there is something profoundly comforting to be able to ask you my question directly.

Okay, here goes:

About 4 1/2 months ago I had an encounter with a man (I am a woman) who engages in risky behavior, in my opinion anyways. These behaviors include having multiple sex partners at once, gay sex, and going to sex parties. He performed oral sex on my, unprotected, on two different occasions, and we had protected vaginal sex. I know that oral sex is a "lower-risk" act, but I am still worried, mainly because I felt that it was somewhat rough and am worried I could have had my nether-regions cut or torn allowing the virus to enter. Anyways, flash forward to 3 1/2 months after the incident. I had a rapid Uni-Gold Recombigen test done which came back negative. This was very reassuring. However, I am now in a steady relationship with a man and we are sexually active. I told him of my HIV concerns from the beginning, but still feel guilty. I have performed unprotected oral sex on him, and we have had a condom break two times.

I would just like to hear in your opinion if you think my test results are definitive and if I can stop worrying and get on with my life and relationship. By the way,I have suffered from moderate to severe anxiety for 5+ years.

Thank you for listening Dr.Bob, your work means so much to a lot of people.

Best regards.

Response from Dr. Frascino


Yep, yours is a QTND (question that never dies) and consequently has an ATNC (answer that never changes).

Your 3.5-month negative HIV test following unprotected oral sex and protected vaginal sex is definitive and conclusive, assuming the latex condom was used properly and did not fail. HIV is not your problem. No way. No how.

Guilt and anxiety are the issues you need to deal with, not HIV, OK?

Be well.

Dr. Bob

Donation Sent... You are my last option dr. Bob aka My hero!!

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