thinking of suicide if
Nov 18, 2010
Dear Doctor. Please please help me. I am 24yrs old. I am from South Africa. My ordeal stared on the 26th October 2010 where I was involved in a one night stand with a Chinese lady. I did use protection when penetrating her; however oral was done on me only without protection. Our sex only lasted about 15min.Before I came she touched me near my anus with her fingers. This was not during penetration when I came into the condom. The first two weeks went by and then around the 9 to the 11th Nov 2010 my penis was feeling really strange (like small, no feeling and pulsating sometimes). I was scared to hell that I might have contracted something from this lady which I have not known her and her past at All. I went to the hospital for a HIV test (Type I & II) on the 12th Nov and picked up blood result on the 13th Nov 2010. It turned out to be non-reactive. This is what was stated exactly on the Pathology report. THE HIV ANTIGEN/ANTIBODY COMBINATION ASSAY REDUCES THE WINDO PERIOD BUT NO HIV ASSAY COMPLETELY REMOVES THE WINDOW PERIOD.FOR KNOWN RECENT HIV EXPOSURES A FOLLOW UP TEST IN 10-14 DAYS IS RECMMENDED. I must admit I did feel a bit better, but I was still feeling not too good. Maybe the guilt is taking over me as I am in a serious relationship. I deeply deeply regret what I have done doctor. Anyway I was still doing a lot of reading on the net regarding the early symptoms of HIV and I was and still am paranoid. I went to see another doctor and told him the whole situation; he checked my urine all fine and said it must be in my head. He prescribed Cifloc 250 (antibiotic) for my penis feeling strange and some stress tablets. Everyone is noticing Im not the same person anymore and Im totally out of it. My throat today is a bit sore and still worried to hell. Im scared for what I have done to my Girl friend as we did have sex w/o protection a few days after the incident. Im sacred that if I am positive I dont know how I will cope and probably do something really stupid to myself.im so scared for my girlfriend as well. Its eating me up doc. I have learnt my lesson doctor, Really, I just hope in Gods gracious name Im ok. Please advise what should I do? I would really appreciate your point of view. Anonyms
Response from Dr. Frascino
I'll make only a few brief comments:
1. I refuse to answer questions from worried wrecks threatening suicide if they test HIV positive. I find this attitude to be highly insensitive to those of us who struggle to stay alive day after day cohabitating with HIV. Consider resubmitting your question without the histrionics.
2. "God's gracious name" has nothing to do with HIV. Assuming that someone contracted HIV because they didn't pray hard enough or believe in god, etc. is once again insulting to HIVers.
3. The proper spelling of anonymous is anonymous, not anonyms.
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