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Bottom turns top
Jul 28, 2010

Hi there from Brazil, Dr. Bob! I'm living with HIV for almost 2 years now, last labs in January this year: CD4 456 23,1%, CD8 1104 55,9%, ratio 0,413, VL 18059, on no meds at all. In Brazil, we only get to start meds when CD4 absolute count drop below 350. I've been dating someone who claimed to be negative for more then a year now. We broke up three months ago and he then got tested negative. Until then, I was bottom all the way, yay -- and we had 99,9% of the times unprotected sex. Now we got back again and it's been almost two months that we've been quite versatile, in fact, most of the times, I top him (but I never come inside). We have talked and talked about it, I now gave up the talking. He insists in doing it unprotected, and I'm not that type of guy who's that much convincing... So I wonder, what are the odds of him getting HIV being versatile? I might also add that I've got genital herpes, and some outbreaks have happened during this whole time. Sometimes I do penetrate him without noticing I'm having an outbreak, mainly because my outbreaks start veeeeeeeery light, with little to no pain and only very small bruising... but that's still a plus, right? He's also got hemorrhoids right now, and we're kinda chillin' out on sex these days, but I'm pretty sure we'll get back on full throttle in a couple weeks...

Keep up the great work, and if you ever come down to Brazil please let us know. You've got a huge fanbase out here! :)

Response from Dr. Frascino

Hey Brazil Guy,

What do you mean "he insists on doing it unprotected"??? It takes two to do an unsafe horizontal mattress mambo! (Or since you are writing from Brazil perhaps that should be an unsafe horizontal mattress samba!) Your boyfriend is playing a dangerous game of sexual Russian Roulette. I would advise you encourage him to come to your next doctor's visit with your HIV specialist and ask that doctor to explain the very significant risk your partner is insisting on! He may already be infected. He needs an HIV-antibody test now, in three months and again in six months to confirm his HIV-negative status. Genital herpes and/or hemorrhoids can increase the risk of viral transmission.

I would suggest:

1. You refuse to have unsafe sex ("no glove, no love").

2. You and your boyfriend read through the information in the archives in the chapter devoted to magnetic couples.

Good luck to you both and a shout-out to my fan base in Brazil!

Dr. Bob



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