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(Donated 40) Father died of Aids, I had incident and scared.

Mar 25, 2010

Yes, firstly I have seeked counseling from when my father died. Terrible story, I was 18 and it was the 80's. He was on his deathbed and I hadn't seen him since I was 3. I refused to go see him for many reasons but aids was one of them. I regret it all the time.

My incident, please tell me I'm stupid if warranted. I came in contact with a unknown womans vaginal fluid. I had touched her breast (I think my finger was dry by then) and she rubbed her breast on my mouth with me touching it in my mouth. I don't recall if it was where my hand was, but this all happened within a few minutes. I dont even know if she was HIV+, but I found out shortly later that she was a prostitute- I did nothing else with her). If she was +, is it possible for transmission through secondary touching, such as touch the breast then putting mouth on it? (I donated) I am scared that I will end up with the same disease my father did and ruin my family. (I am seeking counseling this week)

Response from Dr. Frascino


Your HIV-acquisition risk for the activity you describe is completely nonexistent. I'm glad you are seeking counseling (psychotherapy) to address unresolved issues about your dad and your ongoing unwarranted fears related to HIV/AIDS.

Despite your less than compassionate response to your father's illness, don't be too hard on yourself. AIDS hysteria and misinformation were rampant during the 80s. Even some physicians who should have known better shunned patients with HIV/ADS due to fear. I'm quite certain your dad understood your fears. I'm also certain he forgives you for any behaviors that may have resulted from those anxieties.

Regarding your incident, a I indicated above, your HIV-acquisition risk is nonexistent. I certainly won't call you stupid! A healthy respect for HIV is appropriate. However, unwarranted fears certainly are not. I would suggest you take some time and peruse the wealth of information on this site, in its archives and on the related links. Pay particular attention to exactly how HIV is and is not transmitted. This forum's archives has chapters on HIV sexual transmission and many related topics. Check it out!

One final comment: Perhaps you should consider doing something to honor your dad's memory. Volunteer some of your time at an AIDS service organization or make a donation to an AIDS charity in his honor. Helping those in desperate need, I'm confident, would very much please your dad.

Be well. Stay well.

Dr. Bob

Alqaed what do you think.
Exposed to an HIV+ Partner

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