Hi, Dr. Bob, I've looked through former questions, and haven't found mine, so: about two weeks ago, I stole a pair of undies that were just sitting in my college dorm's laundromat, and they looked clean (no visible stains or anything). They were really nice (GapBody!), so I just...took them. I washed them myself yesterday, and now I am asking you if I can wear them without worrying about catching any form of an std. Please answer this as thoroughly as possible, because I cannot imagine how terrible it would be to assume/be told that it is okay to wear them as if they are my own, only to find out I have developed an std like genital herpes, chlamydia, etc. Obviously these panties don't mean enough to me to ruin my life! Please help! Thank you so much.

Hi,

You want me to advise you that it is OK for you to wear the knickers you nicked from the "sit and spin" college dorm laundromat??? Sorry sweetie, no can do! With or without an HIV/STD risk, I do not condone stealing. What if someone stole your favorite Victoria Secret pushup bra? Remember, what goes around comes around and cosmic payback karma can be a real bitch. My advice is simple: Put the panties back where you found them. I purposely did not answer the question you asked; however, I did provide you the advice you needed! 
Dr. Bob