Dr Bob Please help me. I am GETTING MARRIED.....
Aug 31, 2009
Dear Dr Bob, First off, thank you for all th great advices you have tremendously given out with a witty and yet truthfull humour. I just need your professional outlook on my situation which i could not relate to others in your forum. I had a "Bachelor's Vacation" (felt Hell's Day Out more likely) in Jakarta, Indonesia (i'm from a neighbouring country, could you guess?). This was in May 3rd this year and on the first day I went for a rub and bang with a masseuse. I had protected sex and i ejaculated in her with the condom stil on (no BJ). The second day we went to a karaoke bar which I had sex with the hostess (social escort) in the bathroom. She gave an unprotected BJ for 5 minutes and then we had protected sex (she put the condom on me). After 20 minutes she pulled the condom out and gave me another BJ and i ejaculated in her mouth eventually.(i've read the low risks of oral) So the next day (5th of May)we went to a massage parlour and i had sex with the masseuse. she gave me a BJ mixed with warm and hot water (one of their "offered" services i think) and had protected intercourse and after 20 minutes she pulled the condom and i ejaculated from her handjob (ejaculated on her hands). By this time i was exhausted but we still had the good times coming (how ignorant i was on hiv risks). That night we went to a brothel and i hooked up with a prostitute. We had sex that night in my hotel room which she gave me a protected BJ and we had protected sex. By this time i was so exhausted that i could not even cum. So we flew back home the next day and the guilt finally set in. Only now i realized the risks of my actions.I was thinking with my "mini me" without realizing the outcome of my actions. So on the 10th of May I took an ELISA test that you guessed it, negative. After realising the window period, i took another test within 1 month just to relieve my anxiety. During this time i felt nausea, headaches, stiff necks but no swollen lymphs, fatigue, weight loss or flu except fo the morning runny nose whic i usually have (Thank God). (Could this be the anxiety and depression that sets in knowing there is no way out).No other symptoms has occured within this period. So after three months which was recently on the 8th August I took another ELISA test at the local clinic and tested negative. So Dr Bob, is this result conclusive or should i wait for another 3 months (making it 6 months after possible infection)to be definitive? The medical examiner who did the test suggested 6 months because they told me even after 3 months the virus may still could not be detected.
Please do this favor for me Dr Bob as i am engaged and wants to get married in the near future and i do not want to destroy my loved one's future and dreams. Thank you for your time sir and I will make a donation to your foundation.
Response from Dr. Frascino
Bachelor's vacation indeed! That was an impressive amount of nookie in a relatively short time span. Your overall HIV-acquisition risk is very low, assuming the latex condoms were used properly and didn't break. Unprotected oral sex, particularly insertive oral sex, carries only a very low risk for viral transmission. I would consider your negative three-month ELISA test definitive. Certainly the option to retest at six months is always open to you, but personally I don't feel it's necessary in this case. As for thinking with "mini me," yes, it's a well known fact that the higher powers gave men both a brain and a penis but only enough blood to run one at a time.
Thanks for your donation to the Robert James Frascino AIDS Foundation (www.concertedeffort.org). It's warmly appreciated.
Be well. Stay well.
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