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A Serious Question in Iambic Pentameter
Aug 22, 2009

Thank you Dr. Bob, for taking the time to answer me, I've been pulling out my hair, concerned over HIV. I think I know the answer, but my anxiety will not rest, Even though I did receive a six-week neg ELISA test.

My risk I hope was zero, but I leave that for you to tell. I've leveled with my wife, but I am still in living hell. So I will explain what I did, nothing new to you for sure, Wanting nothing more, than your words I hope will cure.

I went to a massage spa, where I received the rub and tug, She remained fully clothed, her feet firmly on the rug. I laid on the table, for about 40 minutes or so. Then she lubed her hands with oil and tossed it to and fro.

There was no other contact, all types I did avoid, No oral, no anal, no vaginal, no lingual, no kind of sexual toys. It was as simple as it could get, as safe as I thought could be, But now I am terrified that I was at risk for HIV.

Feeling much guilt for what I had done, and fearing for my life, Now I'm terribly worried that I've given HIV to my wife. So what is the risk of such a thing? This manual manipulation? And regardless of your answer, your org still gets a donation.

With my sincerest appreciation,

Tom

P.S. Is essentially no risk the same as no risk?

Response from Dr. Frascino

Hey Tom,

How could I refuse to respond to a question in Iambic pentameter??? Had I a bit more time I would have tried to rhyme my answer, but since I've been away for the past few days, my questions inbox is ready to spontaneously combust. So I'll respond in prose and keep the answer brief. Your HIV-acquisition risk is completely nonexistent.

Tom, you do realize that other anxious questioners will read this and see that I responded to your impressive rhyming. And they will try to do the same. I can just imagine all the "There once was a lady from Nantucket" limericks I'm going to be getting!

Be well. Stay well. Thanks for your donation to the Robert James Frascino AIDS Foundation. It's warmly appreciated.

Tom, just remember:

If all you did is a rub and tug There's no way you could catch the bug!

Dr. Bob



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Western Blot Neg / DNA PCR Detected Yet Inderminant (ANOTHER EXAMPLE WHY PCR SHOULD NOT BE USED FOR ROUTINE HIV SCREENING, 2009)

  
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