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Penis Plotzed
Aug 12, 2009

I won't bore you with the normal problems and fear-mongering, but the day before last I got dragged by a friend to a gay strip club.

Apparently strippers at this particular facility get patrons' attention by wangling their junk on your arm, etc. and grabbing your hand to their crotch, clothed and otherwise.

To make matters worse, other patrons thought it was hilarious that The New Guy was getting this attention on this first strip-club experience, so several fellas were tipped to use their junk to effect the greatest amusement.

By the end of the night I think my ear was caressed by an eight-incher, someone decided to wangle it nearly up my nose -- If I were "into it" I guess it'd be all right, but no, I wasn't really looking for ear-sex and nose-sex don'tchaknow.

I'm assuming I'm not at risk for anything but hypertension (really REALLY not into getting ear-dicked, thank you) and skin-contact infections (herpes, what have you), but you tell me.

More importantly, please tell me being so brazen and craven isn't contagious.

Signed, Bamboozled and Bruised in Boston

Response from Dr. Frascino

Hello Bamboozled,

So while visiting a gay Badda Bing multiple hunky-spunkies ear-dicked with an eight-incher and stuck a tallywhacker up the nose??? WOWZA!

Your HIV-acquisition risk is nonexistent. Now that I've answered your question, would you answer one for me and our gentle (read: "horned up") readers? Exactly where is this penis-palace? Inquiring minds want to know!

Dr. Bob



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