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First sex in my life

May 15, 2009

Hi Dr Bob (You should win the Nobel Prize)

I am a young man who starts involving real sex. Two days ago, I performed anal sex with a man of HIV unknown status.(No oral sex, kissing) It was the first penetrate sex in my life and He did not put his penis in me(Normally, I have just had mutual masturbation with some guys and I just had the negative test about 3 months ago). During the anal sex, I wore a condom without any lubricant however; after I ejaculated I checked the condom by filling in the water. I did not see any leak from the condom. I am so sure the condom was fine. I am just a boy who is growing to be a man so I would like to ask you some questions to educate myself. 1. Am I risky to get HIV from the first protected anal sex? 2. Do I need to get the HIV test from protected anal sex? I am an overseas student in Australia. Having the test costs me a lot of money. 3. Someone also said that every time you have sex even mutual masturbation and protected sex, I need to get test. Is it true? Do I have to follow this rule? I have had HIV Test about 6 times per year for 2 years. 3. How is condom efficiency? On a condoms box, it said a condom can protect HIV 97%. This means that even the condom is not leaked or broken. I still have 3% chance to get HIV? 4. In the future, If I want to have sex with gay men. Checking a condom by filling in water is correct? Do you any method to check a condom? Please educate me. Thank so much I love you. I promise I will donate money when I get my first money from my part time job.

Response from Dr. Frascino


1. If the latex condom was used properly and did not break, your risk of acquiring HIV is essentially nonexistent. HIV can not permeate intact latex. No way. No how.

2. As I mentioned above, assuming the condom was used properly and did not break, your risk is nonexistent. Consequently testing because of this episode is not essential. Most guidelines recommend sexually active folks (multiple partners) get STD screening, including HIV, every 6 to 12 months.

3. No and no. Why did you get so many HIV tests? They were not warranted or necessary.

3. (Another #3?) Condom efficacy is excellent. Very rarely do condoms fail (break). Unfortunately many folks don't use condoms properly and therefore they become less effective. You can read about condom efficacy in the archives, as I've addressed this topic on numerous occasions. Have a look.

4. Most folks do not do a water check after every round of horizontal mattress mamboing. When a condom breaks it generally is not subtle. In fact it's quite dramatic. Mr. Happy's head comes poking through just like your head pokes through a turtleneck sweater.

I would suggest you spend some time perusing the wealth of information on this site, in its archives and on the related links. We have entire chapters devoted to safer sexual techniques, HIV-sexual prevention, HIV-sexual transmission, testing and a whole host of related topics. Check it out!

Stay safe and you'll stay well.

Dr. Bob

Dating a Poz guy and I am negative
Window Period, Viral Load and Chance of Transmission

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