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Odd question for ya Doc.

Apr 30, 2009

I want to start off by saying you do an amazing job for people like me all over the world and I thank you for that!

My situation goes like this... I am a 29 yr old straight male, who travels a lot for work. One of the nights we had off I ended up at the bar with a co worker, and while there ended up meeting a nice older woman. To make a long story short, we ended up back in my hotel room, performed oral on each other, and had maybe 2 mins of unprotected sex before I got up and put a condom on.

My question is, is this low risk? My anxiety is through the roof, because the next time I went to the bar I was told that same lady had given 2 dude oral... not sure if the guy was being serious or not but he was laughing while telling me. The story has a twist to it I was also on a cycle of testosterone (anabolic), could this lower my immune system? And, if she did end up mouth testing the 2 guys dip sticks (trying to see humor in this) and one of them had the virus, could I catch it also in the same night but only hours later? The sad part is I have a girlfriend who is 29 weeks pregnant and I had sex with her after this incident. I am afraid I hurt her and my unborn child. I've had purple spots show up on my chest and think its from the roids but I'm freaking out.

I spoke with the lady recently and she assured me she was clean, but you can't trust anyone in this day and age. Donation will be made friday of 50.00. Thanks and god bless you sir.

Response from Dr. Frascino


Unprotected insertive vaginal sex, even brief unprotected insertive vaginal sex, places you at some degree of risk for STDs, including HIV. Unprotected oral sex carries only a very low risk for HIV acquisition/transmission. That your geriatric nymphomaniac barfly enjoyed several penis popsicles a few hours before your walk on the wild side would not increase your HIV risk.

Your use of "roids" could indeed lead to medical complications but not because of HIV or immune system problems. Cycling anabolic steroids without a medical indication is dangerous on several levels. Aside form screwing up your body's internal, exquisitely balanced hormonal systems, supplemental testosterone will shrink your gonads to the size of Tic-Tacs. Whatever you've been told by other super-sized muscle-heads at the gym, from a medical perspective you are taking a significant health risk. (You can read more about this in the archives.)

My advice is straightforward:

1. Level with your girlfriend. It's not only the best way to cope with your guilt; it's also the right thing to do. Together you can then decide to use latex condoms until your three-month HIV test confirms your negative status.

2. Get an HIV-antibody test at the three-month mark. Tests taken prior to three months are not considered to be conclusive.

3. Stop using supplemental testosterone, unless it is prescribed and monitored by a licensed physician. This will not only save your low hangers but it will also help prevent health problems in the future (such as aggressive prostate cancer and other icky conditions you definitely don't want to have!)

Thank you for your donation to the Robert James Frascino AIDS Foundation ( It's warmly appreciated. In return I'm sending you my good-luck karma that your definitive HIV test is negative. The odds are very much in your favor but testing is still warranted.

Good luck.

Dr. Bob

5 years of hiv fear
Swine Flu

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