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Mat
Apr 25, 2009

Hello Dr.

I'm Mat from Malaysia.

I've tested poz last year & I'm gay

last week, i've met someone...& recently we have declared as couple...i love him so much! very2 much!!!

he doesn't know bout my hiv status & i'll not reveal to him until I comfortable to..

until today, we have yet into heavy sex. both us of only concentrate on oral, rimming, hugging, kissing & etc...he asked me to get anal sex but i'm not ready...but i insist to do it using condom

so far, i can handle myself & avoid any blood transmission to him....

what do you think of the way i do the prevention...& this type of relationship..

does he can still live healthy forever & live happily ever after with me?

Response from Dr. Frascino

Hi Mat,

My advice would be to have a heart-to-heart talk with your new Mr. Wonderful as soon as possible. The longer you wait the greater the chance he will never become your Mr. Happily-ever-after, because he could feel you weren't being honest and upfront with him. He may even worry that your delay in disclosing your status put him at risk for HIV.

Mat, I'd suggest you read through the information in the chapter on "Disclosing HIV Status" in the archives of this forum. Hopefully it will help you. In addition both you and your Mr. Right should review the information in the chapters, "Magnetic Couples," "HIV Sexual Prevention," "HIV Sexual Transmission" and "Safer Sexual Techniques."

Magnetic couples can indeed live happily ever after lives. I speak from personal experience! Communication, honesty and trust are keys to any successful relationship and yours is no exception.

Good luck.

Dr. Bob



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