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TERRIFIED, drug free virgin asks "does semen + dirt = HIV contamination?" Donation given

Apr 19, 2009

So I cut my hand on some glass and i bled quite a bit. I immediately wanted to sooth and moisturize the cut so I grabbed the vaseline petroleum jelly. TROUBLE IS, I dropped the open tin of vaseline onto some 'messed' underwear of mine (by messed, in mean 'all spunked up with semen') The underwear was hidden in a dusty corner underneath my desk waiting for me to wash it separately. Now, this particular part of my room hasn't been cleaned in a while (accessibility issues) and is all dirty and dusty (not to mention the presence of my bodily fluids. Now, without thinking i applied the vaseline onto my open cut, before realising my unhygeinic ( and potentially disease/HIV transmitting?) mistake. Since then i've been trying to tell myself that i have virtually no chance of having HIV but its not enough for my stupid OCD brain. I've been living my life like someone who has HIV. I've been OCD about plasters (or band-aids to you guys) and worse, i've been disinfecting everything that has so much as gotten my spit/earwax on it. Its exhausting. MY WORRY IS That my semen has mixed with whatever has been festering under my desk among the dust-mites and bacteria,and has turned my otherwise harmless jizz into some deathly AIDS soup which has now got into my bloodstream.

I hope in all sincerity that i'm not coming accross as flippant or a joker of any kind.

Please can you tell me straight if there's any chance that I'm infected with HIV.

Rock on, Doc

Response from Dr. Frascino


You're worried that your "all spunked up" tighty whities mixed with "whatever has been festering under (your) desk among the dust-mites and bacteria and turned (your) otherwise harmless jizz into some deathly AIDS soup which has now got into (your) bloodstream"????? WOWZA! Dude, what the hell have you been smoking? Unless the "whatever has been festering under my desk" happens to be a couple of HIV-positive hottie stud-muffins having unsafe sex with your truly disgusting underpants, your HIV risk is completely nonexistent!

I suggest you get help from a psychotherapist regarding your "OCD brain" and your totally unwarranted, completely irrational (but highly amusing) fears of being HIV infected. Show the therapist this post. I'm sure he'll appreciate it on multiple levels, not the least being what a complete fluffernutter you are.

Stop worrying. You're fine (a bit daft, but fine nonetheless).

Dr. Bob

Amazon Guy- Final Question- 150 donation..Please answer my question Doc.
Can I WOO-HOO??!!

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