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I'm not convinced my BF got HIV from me.

Dec 11, 2008

Hi, I have been HIV+ for about 5 years, about 2 on meds(now undetectable), my BF that I have been with for 4 years recently found out he was +. We always practice safe sex and got him tested regularly and he always came back negative. When he found out, I asked if he had been with anyone else and he said no, but I felt there might have been a little hesitation. I mean he is really honest, I dont know if he is scared to tell me if he has or not. Anyway, not the issue- if we did a genotype on him and compared it to mine, would that show if we had the same strand? Or is there any way to see if he really got it from me?

Response from Dr. Frascino


There are ways to compare viral strains, but these are primarily research tools. Genotyping could provide some indication if you have similar resistance mutations, but I wouldn't consider this definitive proof one way or the other. Rather than getting tests, wouldn't it be better just to have a heart-to-heart talk with your boyfriend? The reality is that you are now both HIV infected. Honesty and open communication are essential components for any successful relationship. You have to let your boyfriend know it's OK for him to tell the truth and that you'll work things out together.

Good luck to you both. Be sure to turn your BF on to this site. Have him read the "Just Diagnosed" chapter, which can be easily accessed on The Body's homepage under the Quick Links heading. He can then move on to the expert forums and related content.

Dr. Bob

Nate again--left PB&J unattended, possibly blood sauced?
Question of all questions Aids (ORIGIN OF HIV/AIDS 2008)

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